I'd Rather Be Out On My Bike

Stories to Share

2011-05-15T16:09:00.001-07:00

I have a couple of stories I would like to share.

First off, Amazon had the Wayne's World/Wayne's World 2 double feature DVD set on sale for 11 bucks this week. Add a couple bucks for shipping and that's not a bad deal. When they arrive on May 17th, I can say my life will be just one step closer to becoming complete.

Secondly, I had a funny story to share from the bike race yesterday.
About 5 minutes into the first lap, we started catching a few of the expert 40+ers. The first few I managed to pass on the open double track sections of climbing. However, I managed to get stuck behind one for a bit of time on a longer single track climb. Now I am quite aware of proper passing etiquette (thanks to the more than helpful advice from Kendra), and am usually pretty chill about passing people. But these were the opening miles of the race and I was trying to get up the hill as fast as I could.
After a moment or two of riding behind said individual, a conversation ensued that continued something like this:

Me: Mind if I get by when you get a chance?
40+ Expert dude: Are you in my category?
Me: No
40+ Expert dude: No? (apparently he didn't believe me. Which leads to the conclusion that he obviously couldn't hear me breathing so hard my left lung was detaching itself from the parietal pleura of my chest cavity, clearly indicating I was on a single speed going up the eleventeen billion percent grade hill we were climbing)
Me: No. I'm not in your category. But you should let me by even if I was
40+ Expert dude: It's an F***ing race, dude
Me: Exactly, so if you're going to ride slow, you should let the fast people who are racing get by

I half expected him to kick me over when I did finally get by, but nothing more was said. That last comment on my part was definitely not necessary, but what kind of crap was that? I realize that it is a bike race, that strategy plays a part, and that you want to stay ahead of the competition. However, if you're climbing a hill and someone, even if they are in your category, is stuck behind you and has the balls to say something because they feel that they are that much faster than you that they need to get by, then have the sportsmanship to let them by if you can.

Ok, that was more of a rant than a story.

Feel free to come over this week to watch some Wayne's World and eat some steak.

Party on Phil

2011-05-09T13:32:00.000-07:00

I've spent the last 8 years trying to figure out what I want. To be honest, I have no idea. I've come to a few conclusions as to things I would like to be a part of my life, but in all reality, I have no clue. I've been given an idea or two as to what I SHOULD be pursuing at the moment:
But lets be frank, who am I going to dupe into marrying me?
So I ride bikes.

But I digress.

The point of this little post was to comment on Phil. I have no idea who Phil is, what he does, or where he lives. But I do know he is magic. For you see, Phil has a world. Known simply as Phil's World. Phil somehow produced a miracle when he built Phil's world. Check it out here:

Phil's World is a mountain bike trail in Cortez, CO. Granted it is not perfect (ask any solo rider this weekend how their bum bum is feeling and they may confess that the trail has its bumpy parts) but its about as close as you can get.
Its like he got into my brain, figured out EXACTLY what I wanted, and made it a reality. Its that simple. Now if I could just get Phil to work on building my life for me.

Greatest Honor of My Life

2011-04-17T11:51:00.000-07:00

I've had a lot of good things happen to me in my life. Some of them I've worked for, some of them I've just gotten lucky, and some of them I've worked really really hard for. However, the highest honor I have ever received in my life came in an unlikely form this week.

Check it out here:

I wasn't sure how to respond. At first I was just going to make a witty comment about how the only way to beat Ted was to hire a cute girl to shmooze on him and cut his hair while he was passed out after one of his epic rides (yes that was a bible reference), or putting ex-lax in his Carbo Rocket (which after dealing with the GI issues I've dealt with probably wouldn't even slow me down that much) or something along those lines.

But then I realized I was whole heartedly honored by that blog post. I've never been so flattered in my life. Not even receiving the ever so prestigious Rogers High School class of 2000 "Sports Person of the Year" award can compare to this. To have someone I respect and look up to go through the time and energy to put a circle with a cross through it on a picture of me as motivation is about as flattering as it gets.

I think its finally a sign that I've made it in the cycling world. I can retire for real now.

And so, Rick, with the rest of the season ahead of us, its on. Maybe Kenny and Dan Z. will even start showing up to dance.

Just watch out for Ted Ferguson on his Sir9. You might think he's fast. But "yeah, well that's your opinion"

Winter/Spring Update

2011-04-11T09:28:00.000-07:00

Well, its that time again. Its been a month or two, so it must be time to update the blog. Especially after getting called out by The KC Holley for not updating it.

First off, the retirement thing didn't last too long. I figured that between trying to get into a PhD program and dating a girl I wouldn't have time to train or race. So I retired. Well I didn't get into any grad schools and the girl turned out to be crazy (yes, she dumped me). So here I am. Right back where I started. Right where I've been the last 3 years of my life. In school. No direction. In love with riding bikes.

Apparently the 2 months off the bike didn't hurt too much. I came off last winter with well over 200 hours of base mileage ride time, but don't feel a whole lot slower this spring with a whopping total of 85 miles over the entire month of January. We'll see how this plays out once the later season endurance races start. I had relented to the fact that I would more than likely only be able to ride the Breck 68 this year, foregoing the more manly and much more expensive Breck 100 option. However, after becoming single and not getting into grad school this time around I found some extra time. And thanks to TurboTax for optimizing my return, I found some extra cash.

So back in the saddle it is.

I've been digging on the single speed lately. Mostly because my geared bike started crapping out on me, and I didn't feel like dishing out the monster cash to replace all my XX parts. So I went back to my roots and started riding the SIR9. Not a bad bike. Not bad at all. Granted even with a rigid fork it weighs as much as my front suspensioned Air9...but hey, weight isn't everything. And the best part is that single speed races are only an hour long. So nothing really even matters anyway. I mean if B. Tolbert can ride a full suspension single speed anything goes, right?

Well, back to "working on the thesis". I'll post some race updates soon enough.

Cactus, Sand, Pump Tracks and Retirement

2010-12-06T21:30:00.000-08:00

You can tell I am attempting to work on my thesis again, because I am posting blogs instead of actually working on it.

Either way, we went down to Phoenix this weekend. I know, great way to show how committed I am to finishing school, taking off every weekend to go ride somewhere warm. It was St. George last week and now Phoenix.

The weather was perfect. I rode in shorts and a jersey Friday and Saturday. 70 degrees in December isn't too bad. I think I may have to look into finding a job down there if I ever finish school. If.

We did the Dawn to Dusk race. Killer Hiller, Captain Nails, and I did a 3 maned 4 man team. We had a really good time and I think I can speak for us all by saying it felt good to blow the pipes out and do a little racing around some cacti.

The sandy course made for some fun cornering. It was never as bad as the 24 hours of moab course as there was always a good line through the hard pack, but you could get a little squirrelly on the corners if you wanted.

After the race Kyle took me over to the pump track. I think pump tracks are a lot more fun not after 4 hours of cross country racing. But that's just my own humble opinion.

Mark and me at the transition

Oh, and I retired this weekend. I no longer race bikes. My name will just be Dan for a while. Like all high profile athletes, I will one day come out of retirement, and maybe even be better when I do. But for now, I have decided that I am unable to fully focus my attention on more that one thing at a time.

And unfortunately for my dream of one day being the fastest Wednesday Night Worlds Racer in Utah county....that one thing won't be racing bikes for a while.

I really have to finish this stupid thesis. I mean yeah, a lot of guys do go to college for 8 years....but they end up being doctors or something.

Maybe I'll take up yoga....

Where'd (insert season here) Go?

2010-11-16T15:35:00.000-08:00

Where'd the summer go?

I guess I ask myself that every winter. It seems like last winter just barely got over, the trails are just barely opening up, the days are finally getting longer, and there is nothing to do but shred dirty mountain bike trails all day long, just in time to stare at the snowline, plummeting down the Wasatch all over again.

I guess this must be some kind of life theme. It seems like every stage of life has barely started by the time its over and time to move on to the next. I can remember the day I thought "where'd high school go?", then "where'd my mission trip for my church go?" and even "where'd my hellish summer job of installing fiberglass insulation go?"

For everything there is a season.

And I guess the best way to live life is to milk every season for all its worth. Which is why I've been stuck in limbo the last 4 years. I've been milking every last drop I can out of grad school.

However, I think the time has finally come to move on. To enter a new season. Whether it is a better or worse season matters little, only that it will be the new season, and one to enjoy in its own way.

I just hope it involves me having my own garage. No 28 year old man should be without his own garage. Its killing me.

Frog Hollow

2010-11-15T20:33:00.001-08:00

Raced Frog Hollow last week. That was a total blast. Definitely one of the more enjoyable times I've had racing bikes. Granted my throat swelled up, my legs felt like they wanted to disown me, and my bum bum caught fire, but those aren't the things I remember.

What I remember most was hanging out with some of the people that mean the most to me in this world. Captain Nails, Papa Jo, Big Air Lar', you guys made this one of the best weekends I've ever had. And a special thanks to Shae and Lisa, for making us tasty food. And more especially for putting up with Apuro's GI tract on Little Debbie Snacky Cakes.

(Oh, and a special note to KC: Nice work. Maybe I was just jealous that I didn't beat the next place team by 10 laps...)

Heck Track

2010-09-11T19:11:00.000-07:00

SS State Championships

2010-09-11T15:44:00.001-07:00

SS race went well this morning. I don't know where all the SSers in Utah county were (our plan to get Kenny to show up late worked perfectly) but we had 12 guys show up. Good day of shreddin some sick trail.

I just got the SS built up this week. Still getting used to the thinner Formula brake levers. They feel like they're going to break if I pull too hard. And my eccentric bottom bracket slipped a bit during the race, leaving my chain quite loose. But I got over it.

New Favorite Trail

2010-06-28T15:33:00.000-07:00

TT time

2010-05-17T20:25:00.001-07:00

The season has officially started. It is now time to throw down what you got, and make sure everybody knows how hard core you are. Check out the local TT blogs.

For the dirty mountain bikers:
Dry Canyon Loop
http://drylooptt.blogspot.com/2009/11/dry-loop-time-trial.html

Or for the refined roadies:
Squaw Peak Hill Climb
http://squawpeak-tt.blogspot.com/

Magical Trails

2010-04-26T08:38:00.000-07:00

So this weekend I was out riding my bike. (I know, imagine that)
As I rode I discovered these sweet new switch backs above the Bonneville Shoreline trail north of Dry Canyon. They were quite fun. As I rode I noticed something rather odd:

Alongside the trail there were several magical elves with tiny hoes, shovels, and picks working on the trail!

I'll admit, I was a little weirded out at first. I mean when's the last time anybody even saw a real live elf, other than on the package of those sweet little EL Fudge Keebler Elf cookies? (And those are merely an artist's depiction of how they might look)

So yeah, it was weird. After a while I even noticed they were repairing the trail behind me, filling in skid marks and brake ruts left behind by my careless riding style. I was absolutely amazed. When I finished the little loop I decided to find out a little more.

Fortunately, for my arts and letters credit at the Brigham Young Institute of College Education and Higher Learning and Center For Kids Who Can't Read Good And Wanna Learn To Do Other Stuff Good Too I took an Elf language class.

(Elves don't speak English. So if you wanted to, I don't know, prosecute one for illegally building trails, you'd need to find a certified translator. And most of them are Obama supporting democrats.)

So I asked one what they were doing. He said "Building sweet trails so everybody can come enjoy this beautiful scenery while getting healthy exercise"

I was amazed at his answer. He continued, "Rising obesity is costing our country $344 Billion a year in health care related costs. If everyone in Utah county would just ride our trails once a day, they would burn 500 calories. They would lose a pound of fat a week, 50 in a year!"

I was dumbfounded. I then asked if they had a building permit to be digging up the grass, tearing down all the weeds and brush, and basically destroying an entire ecosystem of life. He said that no, they did not, but that some poor guy named Benny was getting all the wrap from the feds for building the trails.

I got mad and squashed him with my foot. His magical little hat and tiny little hoe are still stuck between the cleats on my Sidis. Little boogers.

Sandbagger in Sea Otter

2010-04-19T13:12:00.001-07:00

I saw a sandbagger with a blue niner in his hand

Walking through the streets of Montery

He was looking for a place on the podium, gonna score some sweet swag and a medal

Aahoo, sandbagger in Cali

So I wrote my own verse to Werewolves of London. Maybe more to come. Depends on how much of a distraction I need from doing actual productive work later.

Basically my new middle name is Sandbagger. In case you wanted to know

AND I totally got some sweet kiss on the cheek action from the podium girl....talk about an awesome weekend

Finals Week

2010-04-12T10:23:00.000-07:00

Oh, sorry, I would write about how rough finals week is going to be, but I don't have any.
Maybe I can take up some box gardening....

The Fates take a poop on Fast Dan

2010-03-26T17:45:00.000-07:00

I am not a huge believer in fate. I like to believe that we shape our own destinies. (Or "densities" as George McFly would have us believe) However, I am thoroughly convinced that the 3 old ladies from Greek mythology that sit around and decide our fate had it in for me today.

First off, its March. The first day of spring has already happened. There have been days where the temperature only drops below 50 around midnight. So when I got up this morning and saw the temperature wasn't supposed to get above 40, I was a little dismayed. But only a little.

As I dressed up to ride I put on long tights and a jacket, thinking they'd be coming off as I climbed. The truth is I couldn't even feel my toes, hands, nose, or brain until the first climb. Fates 1, Fast Dan 0.

As I got to the Shoreline trail the sun started to come out. Started. But never really finished coming out. Totally psyched me out. Fates 2. Fast Dan 0.

As I got down to Springville and headed up the climb along Slide Canyon, the sun finally decided to come all the way out. And get warm. Very warm. Perfect for a long steep climb. By the time I got the top I was drenched with sweat. As I started down the descent the sun conveniently snuck back behind a cloud, resulting in a 50 degree drop in temperature, sucking all the fun out of the descent. Fates 3, Fast Dan 0.

About half way down the canyon I started feeling some stiff bumps in the rear. Sure enough the rear tire had gone flat. Not just a goat head or nail, but a nice tear in the sidewall. Of course it was too big and too much on the side for the Stan's to seal it up. So I pulled my spare tube out, patched up the torn sidewall and inflated the new tube. Sure enough, my spare tube had a huge hole in it. Total deucer for the fates; putting the running total at Fates 5, Fast Dan 0.

As I started walking down the canyon, my hands were too cold to even operate my phone. So I walked. And walked. Much like the Utah pioneers of old, except I did NOT sing as I walked and walked and walked. Just rocked out a little to Motley Crue. The pioneers would have definitely appreciated a little light rock. Fates 6, Fast Dan 0

After warming up a bit, Mark Johansen (I figure if he's gonna be a good enough friend to pick me up in the middle of the day I might as well spell his name right) answered my phone call and came to pick me up. He took me to the shop so I could fix my tire.

After fixing the tire I decided to try Provo canyon trails. As I got to the race course it looked like the sun was about to come out again. Psyche. After promptly hiding behind some dark mean looking clouds it began to snow. Then hail. Then snow. Then big hail. Then bigger snow. I just kept riding. I came to the conclusion that the Fates were now in full force, attempting to take the Fast out of Fast Dan, and I couldn't let that happen. So I kept on riding. Faster than ever. However the score continued to favor my opponents, Fates 7, Fast Dan 0.

The turning point finally came at about 4:00, as I rounded the top of Upper Frank and saw the altar. I hadn't seen it since early December. Three months was a long time. I got a little choked up. I had almost cried the day the big snow happened that sealed off the upper trails for an entire winter. It was like saying goodbye to a friend. And now he was back. The same tears that tickled my corneas 3 months ago were right there to welcome it all back. It was like NBA Jam, Tournament Edition, where you had those rad "Hot Spots" where shots were worth like 9 points. Basically seeing the view of Utah county from the altar was like being on fire and slam dunking from a half-court hot spot. Fates 7, Fast Dan 9. Take that old ladies. Bombing down Betty made the entire day worth it. Life is good.

Just a picture

2010-03-24T11:03:00.000-07:00

I stole this from Miles. I like it.

"Somebody has a case of the Mondays"

2010-03-08T08:04:00.000-08:00

-Note: The first person to name what movie that line is from, they *win a free (slightly used) Racer's Cycle Service water bottle and a mountain bike ride with me: The Phast Dan

-* I'm attempting to boost my number of readers and overall popularity by giving out free stuff. I hear it works well

So its Monday.

I normally don't have to be to work until 1:00 pm. So I normally don't even get out of bed until around noon. I know, rough life, huh? However, today (not so normally) I decided to be productive.

I got up at 7, showered, watched my roommates eat breakfast (I've decided that I'm not going to eat until April. I'm kind of giving up food for Lent. After watching 5'10", 120lb cyclists blow by me this weekend, I've decided that at 165lbs, I'm about 65lbs overweight. Chicks dig skinny guys, right? Maybe I'll start a new blog where I take pictures every day, showing how many ribs stick out of my chest in order to shame myself into getting down to my goal weight: 21lbs. ((yes, that is correct, I want to weigh less than my bike)))

So yeah, I finally managed to get to my office, start thinking about being productive (who really wants to outline the diagnostical differences between simple D.O.M.S. and full blown rhabdomyolysis anyway???) but all I could think about was mountain biking.

And well, since I'm supposed to be here in my office, and not off rolling around in the dirt, I just thought I'd write about mountain biking, since I told myself I'm not allowed to go until at least 10 o'clock this morning.... (only 37 more minutes to kill)

Here is a picture of me this weekend. The weather was perfect, the trail was great, and we all got to go race some bicycles, "yeah, baby"

OK, I can't wait anymore...I'm out of here. Its sunny outside.

Sweet Pictures

2010-03-04T21:08:00.001-08:00

So I've never been into photography. Which isn't to say I don't appreciate some good picture taking skills. My brother married a photographer, and one of my best friend's dad teaches photography...needless to say, I've been "exposed" to some good art (sorry, couldn't resist the pun)

So, to spare you from pictures taken with my phone, take a look at some well snapped photos Kyle took of the new bikes.

Look Here for pictures

Thanks, Kyle

Night Train (never get enough)

2010-03-03T21:43:00.000-08:00

While the rest of you are tucking your kids into bed or voting on the next American Idol, I'm out chasing my own dreams...one night train at a time.

She's finally starting to come together

2010-02-22T21:43:00.000-08:00

Well, its been a month. Time to post something new. I guess the only time I find something worth posting is after a race or when I get some new bike part, or when I come to some life altering conclusion while out riding.

I raced the first week in February...Frozen Hog. Totally sucked. The only reason I didn't quit the thing after running the first mile was cause we needed the points to keep the trophy at Racer's. However, the best comment of the whole race was made by some individual in the first quarter mile or so:

ME: This sucks. Running sucks.

INTELLIGENT INDIVIDUAL: Yeah, I really don't mind getting my butt kicked in a lousy running race

ME: Good point. Running in the snow is so fun though. Especially in stiff soled bike shoes while carrying a bike

INTELLIGENT INDIVIDUAL: Huh?

ME: Oh, wait. Running in slush, slamming my shins on my cranks, and ramming my baby makers into my stem really does suck. What was I thinking????

So yeah, not a whole lot to report on the Frozen Hog. Greggy won the overall, Kenny was right on his heels winning the masters division, and Noah pulled a 1st in the children's division. Me, well, I finished. Either way we did good enough to keep the trophy for another year.Now, as for new parts...well, check this out:
Yup, I finally got a frame to go with my seat collar. Looks good. (and yes, this photo was taken on the kitchen table)
Instead of ordering all the parts one by one like I intended, I ended up just ordering everything at once. Patience never was a virtue I managed to possess for very long.

So yeah, some sick crank, shifters, and derailleurs should be coming tomorrow...feels a little like Christmas....

And now for my life altering life experience....
um....well....
I'm sure something will come up later...

Other than that I have a shameless plug for Ascent, a sweet Garmin ride tracking software.
For anybody out there who uses a Garmin and wants a good way to monitor/track their riding buy the Ascent software. Its the best 40 bucks you can spend.
I heard about it from Miles, and it is just incredible. Super easy to view all your data from each ride.
I had some issues when I first downloaded it, but the customer support was ABSOLUTELY AMAZING. The guy emailed me back quite quickly and we got it all figured out. Very patient with me despite my block headedness.

So yeah, check it out here:
http://www.versiontracker.com/dyn/moreinfo/macosx/31886

12 Hours of Temecula

2010-01-27T11:29:00.000-08:00

Last year Mark "Nails" Johnson (yes, its Johnson. No matter what he might say, his last name is spelled J-o-h-n-s-o-n, like Johnson & Johnson, the makers of baby wipes) decided to be ambitious and do some early season racing. We duo-ed 12 hours of Temecula and then 24 hours in the 'ol Pueblo down in Tuscon, AZ.

Needless to say, we did pretty well in both races. I mean, you can only imagine what happens when you combine Nails' raw speed with my endless giddy excitement and enthusiasm that seems to come out during these stupid (and yes, I mean stupid. Any bicycle race longer than 2 hours is STUPID) endurance races.

Either way, after last year I was determined not to do any more early season racing. I was ready to take a nice easy winter and keep it low key until the first I-Cup race in March.

However, as you may or may not know, I am a sucker for peer pressure. Especially when the phrase "unless you aren't tough enough" is utilized.
Which is exactly what Calvin used to talk me into doing the 12 hours of Temecula...solo...in January. Yeah, go figure.

I did a good job of keeping the training low key so as to not peak in the first month of the year, but there is still something just wrong about having one of your longest races of the season be in January. Just sayin'

So the four of us, Calvin, Darren (Calvin's training partner), Kyle (yeah, he got talked into it too), and I drove down last week. We left Thursday, drove through some seriously crappy weather and made it to Vegas the first night. Calvin had a good friend who was nice enough to let the four of us weirdos stay at his place for the night. We then drove the rest of the way to rainy southern California.

Now I don't know if you've been following the news, but apparently there has been some serious precipitational issues down there lately. We're talking floods and land slides. So of course it makes perfect sense to drive 10 hours to go race mountain bikes in it. Perfect sense...

We set up our tents in the sporatic rain and tried to get a bit of a pre-ride in. Between the rain and the oncoming dark we got about a mile into the course then turned around. Still hoping the rain was going to let up for the race the following day.

Well we slept a bit that night, but between the rain and a certain individual's obnoxiously loud snoring (I'm not gonna name any names. Mostly cause it might have been me) not a lot of sleep happened.

However, as the sun popped out and Saturday got started, not a cloud could be found in the sky. The course dried out nicely, the weather warmed up and it ended up being a perfect day on the bike.

I went out a little hot like always, but managed to "cool the engines" before burning all my matches and settled into a nice steady eddy pace.

All in all it ended up being a jolly day. No GI issues, nutrition worked out well, pit stops ran smooth and the legs lasted the whole day. Not bad for January.

Nothing better than a whole day to ride your bike.

Snow (for real this time)

2010-01-21T06:56:00.000-08:00

Snow Ride

2010-01-20T11:30:00.001-08:00

Progress

2009-12-20T17:56:00.001-08:00

Well my birthday is coming up. I'll be 28. I'm still not sure how I feel about that, but I'm sure I'll write about that later. I've always taken a bit of pride in getting old and being single in Provo, UT.

Like I got away with something.

Kinda like I got through a whole ride on splash mountain without getting a drip of water on me while everyone around me got so soaked they had to go home and change.

Today I was told that to progress any further in life I needed to get married. Makes sense given the emphasis my religion places on families and such. However, when he said the word progress all I could think of was dropping 45 minutes off my Leadville time, or squeezing in 1 more lap at the 12 Hours of Sundance. That's the kind of progress I'd like to see every year.

Maybe we are on different pages.

Or completely different books...

Or maybe I am just a hopeless menace to society...

Group Rides are Under Way

2009-12-19T19:18:00.000-08:00

Stopped for lunch at Joe's in Payson. Best sandwiches ever.

We had a great turn out for the Saturday ride today. 13-14 guys (including a gal, thanks to Heather for adding some gender variety) showed up and rolled around west mountain. Good times. Stories were told, new friends were made, and everybody got a chance to pedal around for a bit. Not a bad day.

One Piece at a Time

2009-12-17T19:13:00.000-08:00

So the latest bike build is coming along rather slowly. One piece at a time. Just like the Johnny Cash song except it won't quite be free. I'm almost sure I could pull it off, taking one part/bolt from the shop each day over a few years, but quite frankly I don't want to wait that long for my dream bike. Oh, and I guess it really wouldn't be fair to Racer's Cycle Service.

Either way its going to be sweet.

So far I have this much:
Yup. That's it. A seat collar. A blue seat collar. Bit by bit, piece by piece she's really coming together. But don't worry, by mid January everything should be here...I hope.

PS Thanks to Kye for the seat collar. It was a Christmas present I wasn't supposed to open yet...

Building Bikes

2009-12-16T14:53:00.000-08:00

To this day one of the most exciting things is to plan out and build a bike. I don't know what it is, but there is something about scouring through parts and comparing different builds that just gets me flat out excited.

I also happen to be a numbers guy. So comparing weights, prices, price to weight ratios, and all that just makes for a good time. I currently am in the habit of using excel spreadsheets. They get kinda big. Ask Kyle or Rick.

As of right now I just finished building a fixed gear commuter. (Notice it is NOT a "fixie" but a "fixed gear". If it were a "fixie" a pair of girl jeans, a white belt, and cup holder for my soy latte would be prerequisite items to riding)

I've had the frame for a year. Its the Surly Traveler's Check. Basically a Cross Check frame with couplers so it can come apart and fit into a standard size suitcase, thus negating the need for over-sized luggage fees when traveling. I got it last year for my trip to San Francisco (oh, silly, its not what you think...) and have put it to good use since. I only have to fly with it like 20 more times to save enough money on baggage fees to justify the cost of the frame....

Anyway, I've had it kicking around the last year with spare parts on it, built up about half a dozen different ways, depending on what parts I needed from it. However, every bike needs an identity. The bike has horizontal drops in the back so late this summer I obtained a rear flip flop wheel, got some decent single speed cranks this fall, and just this last weekend finally built up a front wheel to complete the bike.

Granted I am going to pull half the parts back off next week when I fly home with it, but for now she's finally complete.

Next Level Training: Featuring Coach Dan

2009-12-07T09:19:00.002-08:00

A few guys in the area have expressed interest in stepping it up this next year. Getting a coach is a great way to do that. Now here comes my shameless plug for....myself.

As an avid cyclist, masters student in exercise physiology, and pending level 2 USA Cycling certified coach, I figure I should start putting my experience to good use. Which is why I've come up with....drumroll please....
Next Level Training.
Yup. That's right. I am officially selling myself out as a coach. Don't worry, I will still be more than happy to listen to any training questions you may have out on the group rides...I'll just expect some form of payment if you want an answer; like a pack of Mike and Ikes or a few grains of CarboRocket.

I've been working with a few guys in the area for the last few seasons and I think they would agree that having a method to the madness is quite beneficial.

The good things is that now there is a more economical option to those of you who are looking for a bit more structure in your training. After looking around at coaching prices I can assure you hiring Coach Dan is quite economical. After all my reason for coaching isn't to get rich. If I wanted to get rich I'd start a bike shop. I just like helping people. Especially when it comes to bikes.

So if you are interested check out the blog. Give me a call or email and we can chat more. I'd love to work with you so we can all put "fast" at the beginning of our names.
Check out the blog:
Next Level Training
Wondering if getting a coach is right for you? Look here:
Rationale for Hiring a Coach

Finally Got the Cannon Video to work

2009-12-01T16:30:00.001-08:00

Thanksgiving Cannon

2009-11-30T18:48:00.000-08:00

6 years ago in the late fall of 2003, after a very successful year of Dry Ice Bomb holidays, my mind reached a level of unease. While blowing up random objects with soda bottles filled with dry ice was fun and entertaining, I knew there was more out there.

I knew there was a potential not being reached. So I dreamed. And as a direct result of that dream, harnessing the absolute power of dry ice I bring you....

The dry ice bomb cannon.

Invented by yours truly in 2003 and powered solely by the explosion of a 20oz soda bottle of dry ice it generates enough force to launch a can over a 26 story building. Or...as you see here, the power to smash a TV.

After several years of experimentation with multiple brothers involved, the cannon has returned, better than ever.

Rah Rah!

2009-11-23T13:20:00.000-08:00

On my way to school today I noticed a poorly parked car as depicted in photo A:Photo A

Not only did this car stick halfway out into the road, but it wasn't even straight.
I didn't think much of it until I got a little closer and observed a certain little sticker on the back:

You really can't see it very clearly in the picture, but the sticker says:

"BYU Cheerleader"

I guess they aren't much smarter in college than they were in high school...

"P.H.A.S.T. Dan"

2009-11-21T10:41:00.000-08:00

I know you aren't allowed to pick your own nickname (which for the record I didn't pick it, just how to spell it) but from now on I will be P.H.A.S.T. Dan.

This one time I rode my bike fast, so Nails started calling me Fast Dan. I think the "PH" spelling of fast adds some character:

Partially
Hot
And
Somewhat
Tempting

Probably won't catch on, but I thought I'd give it a try.

Stupid Zoobies

2009-11-18T18:40:00.000-08:00

I rekindled an old flame today. It has been at least a month (probably more) since I have ridden my road bike. Maybe its a good sign that I am finally growing out of that phase of life.

Or maybe I never will.

Despite the fact that my 2009 race calendar ran up a tally of 20+ mountain races, and only 5 on the road, yet I still own a nicer road bike than mountain bike is a sign that I am still clinging on to something.

Which brings us to our first item: A stupid zoobie.

As I was walking out of the PE building with my bike in tow, leaving for a late afternoon ride today, some kid behind me with absolutely zero preliminaries blurts out, "How much did you pay for your bike?"

(Side note: This actually happens all the time. People seem to know that road bikes tend to cost a touch more than the Huffys they rode as kids, and love to hear people say out loud how much they paid. Get a frickin hobby)

I was quite taken aback at first that a complete stranger would ask such a personal question. Was I asking him how old his mom was? Or how much his girlfriend weighed? (standing next to him)

Of course not. I may have my own quirks and quite often show an immense lack of social awareness, but good heavens, even I know where the line is that designates something as "too personal". Why don't you just ask me the size of my jock strap while your at it?

As I stared at the seemingly innocent youth, trying to determine if he was actually sincere, or just playing some kind of sick joke, he added "If you don't mind my asking"

Oh, sure. Just like how old ladies at church can get away with saying ANYTHING about ANYBODY as long as the offending comment is followed by the standard "bless his heart" disclaimer.

In this case the "if you don't mind" comment only solidified his stupidity and persistence. I stalled, stammered, stuttered, and stared back, not sure what to say. A million ideas ran through my head as to how I could respond.

I quickly began to add up all the parts and their respective costs, wondering if I could even come up with any kind of total monetary value. However, the first part I came to was to the saddle, the limited edition SLR. Sure it cost a couple of bucks, but take into account the hours of eBay searching, bidding, waiting, rebidding, stressing, losing, re-finding, bidding, stressing, and finally winning; there was no way I could put a monetary value on it.

And the list went on.

Each and every part was handpicked, scoped, weighed out, saved up for, reviewed, and installed by hand, by yours truly. (And just why don't I race road anymore?) The only thing original left on the bike was the frame, a few logo stickers on the frame, and the shifters.

After running through the options, I finally mumbled something about how the original retail value was something like such and such amount

"Wow" he mused. Yeah, wow is right, I thought to myself, I should have just bought the thing, left it stock, and dumped my money into a fat diamond ring, maybe I'd be married by now.

He then proceeded to tell me how expensive bicycles are, but that you can find really good used ones for $200.

I didn't dare say a word about my seatpost...

Hiking

2009-11-16T14:08:00.001-08:00

So the snow finally hit. However, I refuse to let it keep me inside. So this winter I have resolved on a secret (well not any more) strategy to keep me in shape: Use the snow to my advantage. I am planning on using the following off season tactics to help me maintain the appellation "Fast Dan"

Cross Country Skiing
Snowshoeing
Snow Shoveling (I happen to know many widows who pay top dollar for selfless service acts)
Snow Blowing (I also know many rich widows who own snow blowers and pay even topper dollar to have their drives snow blown)
Snowman Building
Snowball Throwing
Snowcone eating (I like grape)

Any additional ideas are welcomed.

Temper Tantrums, Motley Crue, Dancing With Myself, and Last Ride of the Season

2009-11-11T20:39:00.000-08:00

4 Items of Business tonight:

First:
I threw a temper tantrum today. Now you may be thinking it was some kind of modified adult version, but no, it was full on 2 year old style anger management.

The only thing adult about it was the language used. For those of you who know I attend BYU, lets just say I shouted a word starting with "D" and ending in "arnit". For those of you who don't know about my affiliation with the religious institution after the order of Brigham, use your imagination as to what came out. You're probably right.

My infantile outburst came somewhere around the halfway point of my ride this evening. I was halfway up between the rock pile and the top of Dry when I hit a steep, loose rocky pitch that has a tendency to make back wheels lose traction and slip.

It wasn't a particularly technical section, not nearly as bad as parts of upper Frank, but add the following factors up and you can maybe see why it happened: A) my rear tire was practically bald from 4 days of Moab, B) My legs are still burnt out from 4 days of Moab C) I lifted weights with my legs yesterday D) I've been in a semi grumpy mood lately, probably a result of the slow but sure onset of the realization that I am going nowhere with my life.

The moment I slipped and had to clip out and put my foot down I became quite outraged. It wasn't even the hardest part of the trail. The bike was promptly thrown into bushes and I began to weave a tapestry of profanity tight enough to hold water. (Ok so I really just said "dangit" but oh, my thoughts of what to say ran wild) Either way my actions resembled that of a young child, attempting to communicate the disappointment associated with not getting a lollipop. It was bad.

Approximately 5 seconds after the event finished I picked up my bike. I came to my full senses at how silly I must have looked, even looked around to make sure nobody saw my tantrum, remounted my bicycle, and proceeded to ride up the rest of the hill. It was an embarrassing event, but apparently not so much as I am now writing about it to tell both of you who read this blog.

Second:
The night of the Helloween ride, Aaron Smith shocked and amazed us all by smoking the pipe, at night, and in costume. How was this done? you might ask...well, quite simply, he simply sang "Jumpstart My Heart", by Motley Crue. Since that night I have questioned the powers of 80's rock, but it wasn't until tonight that I attempted to utilize the secret power of the Crue. As I came around to the top of Dry Canyon I found the song on my iPod, cranked it up as loud as I could, and began singing along, as loud as I could. When I arrived at the corner marking the start of the pipe I beheld a middle aged couple (probably just done smoking the pipe themselves, hiker style) staring at the pipe.

I paid no attention to the multitude nor did I give heed to what they thought of me. I continued along my merry way, singing "Jumpstart" as loud as I could and bombed the pipe with all the confidence in the world. NEVER underestimate the power of the Crue. Which brings us to point #3

Third
Blink 182 once covered a song "Dancin' with Myself" and while the implied meanings are completely different (I won't go into what the song is about here, but I am sure you can use your imagination to figure that one out) I found some parallels in my newfound ability to sing and dance, even when nobody else can hear the music. My new lifetime hero, Adam Lisonbee taught me this while on our trip to Moab. Dance, even if nobody else can hear the music. And so I have. I also sing. Its kind of embarassing, but hey, my name is Dan, don't you ever tell me how to live my life.

Finally
I think today may have been the last good ride of the season in Utah County. Snow and rain are expected the rest of the week, and once the trails bog down its tough to find them dry till spring. I rode everything I could tonight, (and on a side not woudl strongly recommend a light slightly larger than a MiNewt if you plan on doing much single track in the dark) and just soaked it in, not knowing when the next time I would be able to hit all my favorite trails in the same day again....soon...I hope...

Well, that's all I have to say about that.

Still New to Me

2009-11-09T17:36:00.000-08:00

I still consider myself a new mountain biker. After all those years as a roadie, I got used to picking my favorite roads and routes to ride on the road. Now, however, I get to pick from a whole new assortment of trails.

I am still finding new trails, new ways to ride trails, and new ways to connect them. The first year I started calling myself a mountain biker, I rode 4 trails: 1) The old race course 2) Dragon's Back to Frank to the Alter then straight down 3) The Big Springs Lolipop, and 4) Bonneville South at Bridal Veil across Squaw Peak road

That was it. The only 4 trails I rode last year. By combining those 4 routes I rode all I could ever want. I even did multiple 10 hour+ rides on them in preparation for the 12 hours of Sundance race last year by riding the same trail 4 or 5 times, then moving on to the next.

Mountain biking was still so new to me I was fine with it. In fact I loved it. The thrill of bombing down sweet single track was a feeling impossible to capture on a bike with skinny tires and drop bars limited to paved lanes. I could have ridden the same trail every day and still gotten a kick out of it.

Well, over a year later and I'm still fining new trails. It seems like every week I find a new favorite ride. I try new trails I hear about, meet people on trails that show me new places to ride, and even explore a little on my own. And its a blast. This month, up Rock Canyon and down Squaw has been my new favorite ride. I've only done it a few times but am getting better at that stupid rocky climb up Rock Canyon, and faster down the descents. The views are awesome (title picture on the blog is looking out over Utah lake from the Squaw Peak road) and the riding is just the right balance between hard and fun.

Overall it is definitely the ride of the month...until I find a new one next week...

Moab

2009-11-09T12:34:00.001-08:00

Stole this from Adam. I believe this says it all about the Moab trip this weekend. However, I will write a bit more...later...

So much for secret training rides

2009-10-25T19:16:00.000-07:00

So after an entire summer of riding at night, riding alone, and riding on secret trails, routes, and hills, all for the sake of nobody knowing my super secret training rides, I find out this last week that every single ride I've been on, is posted publicly on garminconnect.com.

I thought the web based training log was great, at first. Until I realized that every workout I've done over the last year is posted for every one of my competitors to see. Not only the ride, but my heart rate, lap times, and interval sets, all there for anyone to see.

Talk about your all time back fires

Thanks Aaron for the heads up. I'm currently tracking all your rides on there too, so come spring, we'll see who has the edge on who....

Intern Dan

2009-10-24T16:22:00.000-07:00

This week marked a turning point in my life. I finally got to go on a lunch ride with the big kids. The corporate professionals with real jobs, families, and a little thing I like to avoid known as "responsibility", all go ride mountain bikes during their lunch breaks. Well, on Friday it finally worked out that my school schedule allowed me to go the same time they all went.

I was excited to get my chance to show what I had. It was a much appreciated internship with the who's who in utah county.

And it was magical.

We even invented a new term, "Toking the Pipe" referring to riding up the pipe on Dry. None of us actually managed to Toke the Pipe, but we all gave it a fair shot.

We even resorted to full on time trial start attempts, with Kenny and Rick holding Aaron upright so he could get a strong start. Still, no dice.

Tonight's Why

2009-10-22T19:39:00.001-07:00

I never really know what to title these posts. Halfway through I always end up writing about something completely different than I started.

Tonight, I just got back from watching "Race Across the Sky", and believe it or not, it has made me think a lot about life, where mine is going, and what I want out of life. (yes, this will probably end up deeper than I originally intended, and who knows if I'll even post it. It's likely fate is to end up saved as a draft, like a good 90% of the other posts I write)

Either way, the movie got my brain spinning about life, the purpose, and what really matters. Its funny to think that a movie about endurance mountain biking has got me so spun out on what really matters, but it has. Everywhere you look you can see and hear different voices trying to tell you what matters in life.

I can turn on the TV and hear the media tell me I need to dress or act a certain way to be important in life. I can look at ads telling me I should buy their product in order to be cool and have any kind of self worth. I can even feel pressure from those around me to do what they do, believe what they believe, and value what they value. (While this pressure is very much unintentional and inadvertent, it does exist)

But I ask again, what really matters in this life?

After watching that movie, a few things are starting to solidify. To this day, the greatest words I believe ever spoken to me came from one of my best friends, Calvin Cahoon. Those of you who know Calvin know he likes to talk. A lot. So it only makes sense that eventually some of the most profound words I've ever heard a human say came from his mouth. Earlier this year while driving back from Leadville he made the comment "All you need in life are friends and family. If you ain't got that, you ain't got nothin', but if you've got that, you've got everything"

I'm not sure why that hit me so hard, or why it sunk so deep when it was spoken by Calvin, but it did. Maybe because Calvin knows life. Maybe hearing it from someone who has seen as much of life as he has made it all the more real.

Not long ago I was 100% positive all I needed in life was my own house (with a spacious garage) and a large "family" of bikes. I could live close to trails and open road, go riding every day, road or mountain, train, get fast, go to work, go to bed and be the happiest man alive. I was 100% positive I didn't need friends to slow me down, girls to waste my money, or family to waste my time. All I needed was my self. I lived like that for a while. Dreaming of the day my ideal life would come true.

Well it turns out I was 100% wrong. Over the last year or so I have seen Calvin's prophetic words come true. The more I think about my friends and family, the more I see a reason to live, to ride, to exist. This life is about people. Not about beating them in races. Not about getting them to buy your product and make money off them. And not even about how you can get them to do what you want them to do. But about loving them. Its about getting to know people for who they really are, and genuinely appreciating that.

I think about all my friends in the cycling world. Every single one has left an imprint on my life, just as much as every ride I have ridden has built me into who I am. It's the casual weekend rides with Mark, Kevin, and Larry, the intense training rides with Kyle, the sweet times around the fire at 24 hour races with some of the best people whose company I've ever enjoyed. Its about watching Racer smile, cause he gets to ride his bike in Moab (despite having 58 dislocated ribs) watching Craig come in after cranking a sub 1:20 on a beach cruiser, and watching Karson rally 6 inches off the ground on our homemade dirt jump.

Its about watching dear friends reach new heights, ride harder, have more fun, and being there to share it with them.

Its about doing what we love to do, with the people we love doing it with.

That is what matters in life.

Family and friends.

I am 100% confident that even if I never got to ride a bike again (heaven forbid) I could still die a happy man, from what I've learned, and who I've met.

After watching "Race Across the Sky" this all hit home. As I sat in the theater full of members of the Utah County cycling family I realized something. One thing had brought us together, and while the exact activity doesn't matter, it was a common ground we all shared, and it made us a family.

As I sat there, listening to story after story about participants in the Leadville Trail 100, people coming back to the sport after getting hit by cars or having both knees replaced (Larry, you're still my hero) and what hit me wasn't that they were back racing a 100 mile mtb race, but what knocked me over like a ton of bricks was the response of their loved ones. Watching a man tear up when he talked about his wife getting hit by a car, or watching little kids scream "go dad!" as their beloved daddies finished the race, or hearing Dave Wiens go on about spending time with his family and how supportive they are. That right there is what life is about.

Cycling is great because it gives us all something to work at, an area to improve ourselves in, and a huge sense of achievement. However, what is any of that worth if we don't have someone to share that with? What is the point in getting faster and stronger if we do it alone? What joy is there in riding our guts out, only to go home to an empty house?

As the movie ended, it showed individuals finishing who weren't in the top 10. However, by the looks on their faces, the hugs from family, and kisses from loved ones, you'd have thought they were on top of the world. And that, my friends, is what friends and family will do for you. Put you right up there on top of the world.

So thanks. Thank you to everyone who has ever let me ride with them. Thank you for sharing your conversation and thoughts, and allowing me to share mine. Thank you for being some of the best friends anyone could ever have. Thank you for letting me be a part of your family.

Now if I could just get the lousy ball rolling on getting a family of my own...

The Why

2009-09-10T15:06:00.000-07:00

A personal essay on Dan, by Dan

I like to ride bikes. A lot. I've never been able to pin point the exact reason why, and don't think I ever will. For every different season of life, there is a different reason to ride. For every different mood of the day, there is a different motive to pedal.

I've ridden to get away from the stress of school, to relieve the pain of heartbreak, to celebrate the joy of finding someone new. I've ridden to get in shape, to stay in shape, to lose weight, to get fast, to gain endurance. I've ridden with friends to enjoy their company, to share my life, to listen to theirs, to share my woes, and to listen to theirs.

I've ridden to be alone, to bask in the solitude of an empty road or serenity of a remote trail. I've ridden to the sound of nothing but leaves in the wind, to the sound of my own heart beating, my own breath gasping, my own joints creaking, and my own chain squeaking. I've ridden to the sound of Led Zeppelin, U2, Beyonce, The Killers, The Cure, The Who, and Johnny Cash.

I've ridden away from people, places, problems, and feelings, and ridden into strange places, new places, new people, and strange people. I've ridden to the store for food, to the doctor for physical healing, to the church for spiritual healing. I've ridden to friends houses to visit, to the bank for money, to work to earn money, and to the bike shop to spend money.

I've done things on a bike that have pushed my known limits. Accomplished feats I never dreamed possible. Ridden faster, further, longer, over bigger hills, down steeper hills, around lakes, around mountains, over mountains, and across fields. I've finished rides that that seemed impossible, reached summits that seemed unreachable, cleared trails that seem impassible,

I've ridden my bike into cars, trees, holes, ditches, bushes, logs, snowbanks, ice sheets, rocks, and rivers. I've broken skin, bones, wheels, handlebars, seats, spokes, and helmets. I've torn jerseys, shorts, and socks; scraped knuckles, knees, shins, chins, paint, and carbon. I've ridden into physical injury, with only scars now to remind me of the pain. I've ridden into emotional healing, with only memories now to remind me of the pain.

Riding has taught me to be tough, has taught me to persevere, has taught me to take pride in my abilities, and humility in my shortcomings. I've worked hard, I've slacked, taken the hard road home, taken the easy way out. I've gone the extra mile, climbed the extra hill, pushed the harder gear, felt the pain of exertion, and appreciated the joy of relaxing.

I've ridden to train, to get fast, to win races, to finish long events, to ride from Seattle to Portland with my dad, to sprint, to time trial, to practice handling, to practice popping wheelies, to practice riding with no hands.

I ride to think. I ride to ponder. I ride to let my mind wander. I've had my best ideas while out on my bike, and my worst ideas.

I've ridden to get away from pain, ridden to feel the pain, and ridden in spite of pain. I've ridden to prove to myself I could, ridden to prove to others I could, ridden for noble reasons, ridden for foolish reasons, ridden out of humility, ridden out of pride. I've been out on my bike during the highest of highs, when it felt like the even the top of the world was under me, and I've been out on my bike at the lowest of lows, when I felt like nothing was worth living for.

I've ridden myself into who I am. Riding has allowed me to shape, mold, build, and rebuild myself into existence. Out on my bike I am able to deal with life and cope with what is real. Out on my bike I have been who I was, am who I am, and will be what I am to become.

Riding has given me what I have, made me who I am, and taught me what I know.

And that is why I would rather be out on my bike.

Cecil's Secret Stash

2009-08-06T12:47:00.000-07:00

Saw this outside the BYU student center today. Go ahead, zoom in. Yup, it really does say "Cuban Cigar, INC"

Watch your back Lance

2009-07-03T08:01:00.000-07:00

So Lance IS going to do Leadville again this year. And I suppose he thinks all this "racing in France" stuff is going to help him get in shape for a quick 100 miler on the dirt. Well, Lance, all I can say is watch your back. Fast Dan and Captain Nails have been on a secret little training schedule of their own. (which just might involve us riding our CompuTrainers every day with the same stage you're racing in the tour pre-programmed into our bikes. Except we don't have domestiques to draft off the whole time...)
So when push comes to shove, and you're happy to get close to 6 hours...we'll just see who's smashing the 5 hour mark...

See video here

http://link.brightcove.com/services/player/bcpid17217221001?bctid=27761490001

Missing Dork Discs

2009-07-02T21:30:00.000-07:00

Check this out:
http://reviews.roadbikereview.com/blog/cannondale-recalls-road-bicycles-due-to-fall-hazard/
OR
Click Here

This is hilarious. Cannondale is having to recall almost 1,300 bikes because they were shipped without the dork disc. The first thing anyone who actually rides bikes does is take the thing off. Poor Cannondale.

New Do

2009-06-04T12:57:00.000-07:00

Completely Obsessed

2009-06-01T15:15:00.001-07:00

(Basically the point of this post is to prove to myself and both of you who read this that I am hardcore...if that kind of vanity upsets you, please skip reading this)

I spent last week in Seattle for a school research conference. I was there Tuesday to Saturday.

I got to see my mom and dad which was really nice.

I got to learn a lot about science and stuff. That was really nice too.

I didn't get to ride my bike every day. That wasn't very nice.

I did get to rent a sweet mountain bike and ride one evening after the conference was over. I pretty much warmed up for 30 minutes, rode my brains for 30 minutes, then cooled down for 30 minutes, somehow hoping it would make up for the 3 days off I was forced to take this week. That was kinda nice.

I missed a couple of races that week because of the conference. That wasn't very nice at all.

However, it's never done any good to complain, whine, or otherwise lament things you can't change. So I just accepted the fact that I was going to miss a few races (one of them being the Intermountain Cup race at Sundance....missing that=not very bloody nice one frickin' bit)

As I got home Saturday evening, having been off the bike for 2 days straight, I promptly turned on my computer, started up iTunes, and started packing my little shuffle full of songs to take me around the alpine loop. Never mind it was 9:00 pm. Never mind it looked like a bit of rain might kiss the valley. Never mind all I had eaten was some airplane biscott and a Fresca. I was going.

While my computer was on, a friend started chatting with me. They asked how my week was and how my races went. I explained that I had been in Seattle all week for school stuff and hadn't gotten a chance to ride much, let alone race.

"Oh good" my friend replied, "if you can miss races like that, it shows you aren't completely obsessed"

"Sure" I typed back. "I'm not completely obsessed"

I almost took it as an insult.

I figured it would just be best to leave it at that and not mention how I sleep with my bikes in my room, how I make social plans around training, how I've skipped major family events for races, or even how I actually feel dirty when I'm forced to skip a day of riding....

Oh, yeah, sure....I'm not obsessed at all

Shameless Plugs

2009-05-18T19:29:00.000-07:00

Today I am here to put in plugs for 2 guys that saved the day for me:

Elden "Fatty" Nelson and Brad "Biggest Stud I"ve ever met" Keyes
First off, I've been rather sick the last several weeks and my stomach has not been able to handle a whole lot. Not exactly conducive to racing bicycles, where food seems to be a necessity as far as providing energy for riding. (I've tried other substances such as Boonen's "Cocaine Diet", Tommy Simpson's "Speed Diet" and even Racer Gibson's "Candy Diet", but my tummy doesn't seem to like to take anything in lately.

So you can imagine it was with some hesitation that I drove the hour to Soldier Hollow (or let Mark drive me there, anyway), paid an entrance fee, and signed up to race, having not eaten anything solid in a few days. However, to my rescue came CarboRocket, the ultimate drink created by Brad Keyes. I'd been on the CarboRocket diet for a few days preceding the race as it seemed to be the only thing my tummy liked.

I was a bit nervous on the start line as I wondered if my tummy would cooperate for at least the 2 hours I needed it to for the race. Well, needless to say, everything went just fine, thanks to the wonderful, sweet, fulfilling, (not to mention delicious) concoction known as CarboRocket. I made it the whole race with zero tummy aches, plenty of energy to hold a good pace the whole race, and a sweet taste in my mouth. Thanks, Brad! Best stuff ever invented.

Next shamless plug goes to Elden. After the race we thought it would be a good idea to go ride around Lambert Park in Alpine. However, to our dismay we discovered I had a bit of a mechanical issue going on with my bike. As we sat there trying to figure out what to do, Mark remembered that Elden lives only a few blocks away.

So we ventured over and asked for a hand. He was more than helpful in gettting us back on the trail and I tip my hat to him for being the super ride saver of the day. An absolute gem of kindness. Thanks, Elden! Nicest guy ever.

Well, now that that's done, I'll go back to riding my bike....

5 Mile Pics

2009-05-10T23:19:00.000-07:00

A face not even many mothers could love
Joy

Secret Training

2009-05-10T23:01:00.000-07:00

The first year I raced bicycles, Kyle and I had an ongoing battle for who could ride up Squaw "Puke" the fastest. I held my own for a few weeks until he threw down a 23 minute climb time. Nothing I could even come close to without a V6. Since that year (2006) I haven't really tried very hard to best my Squaw time...until now. My new secret training ride is just that...Squaw.

(Now that it's not a secret anymore, I'm fully aware everyone in Utah county will start kicking my trash at the ICUP's...)

Either way, I forgot just how pretty it is up there...

(Really the entire purpose of this post was to post a picture of my bike...you could maybe say I am slightly infatuated with it)

Rain and sick

2009-05-03T19:45:00.000-07:00

It rained this weekend. I have been sick for the last week and a half, so I secretly hoped the rain would cancel the race. No dice.

However, to my advantage, the race was re-routed from 11 mile loop down to a 3.5 mile loop. I managed to fake it for 45 minutes and not come in dead last.

It was super muddy, super wet, and super fun. I'll post some pics as soon as I get them from Kyle. Kyle, on the other hand, double flatted, bringing his total "mechanical" count to 8, I think. That's a fairly high number, when you take into account that there have only been 3 races. I am 97% confident that as soon as Kyle gets through a whole race without some kind of bad luck he's gonna kick everyone's trash. THE Kyle I met so many years ago is back. THE Kyle that knows how to lay down the hurt, push it further, and make it hurt even more. I am definitely excited for him.

As for me, I just gotta get healthy so the 16 year olds quit beating me up the hills....

And, Racer, sorry for making you flat on the muddy part. Joel paid me to clip your front tire with a "Ben Hur" style wheel spike I have installed on my rear hub...

PS Is it weird that for some reason this weekend got me just a bit excited for 'cross season to start already when its only May?

Conspiracy Threory

2009-04-11T12:32:00.000-07:00

I have concluded that between weather.com and Mother Nature itself, there is a conspiracy theory whose sole purpose is to make me slow. My computer either tells me it is going to rain/snow, so I don't ride, or it doesn't tell me when its going to actually precipitate, causing me to get all ready to ride, then not, thus making me slow.

Don't worry, I'm on to you...

PS I finally finished the Pueblo post....

24 Hours in the Old Pueblo

2009-02-17T12:58:00.001-08:00

Several months ago, and probably under the influence of heavy prescription medicine and/or NyQuil (probably a combo of both), Nails and I somehow talked ourselves into doing a 24 hour race...duo. I've suffered through a 24 hour race before, but that was on a 4 man team, and I think the word "suffer" is the only real solid memory I have from the experience.

The combination of having the slowest lap times, 941 MPH winds fold my tent almost in half so that the top was pounding my face like a spring loaded club while trying to sleep the night before the race, inhaling approximately 3 metric tons of dust, developing a wheezing cough that sounded like I'd smoked enough to keep Joe Camel in business myself the last 20 years, feeling nauseous enough to want to vomit after every Little Debbie Oatmeal Cream Pie I ate.....well, I think that pretty accurately describes my first impression of 24 hour racing.

Luckily enough for me, the guys on my 4-man team were fast enough to make up for my complete lack of 24 hour racing competency, pulled some sweet fast times, and got us on the podium. It was a magical moment.

It may have been in the aftermath of that event, after my brain had blocked the 23.5 hours of pain and and pleasantly remembered the .5 hours of positive happy time (I learned all about how the human brain can cause itself to "forget" or block super traumatic experiences in life as a "defense mechanism" in my Psychology 111 class at the Coug. Great stuff they're teaching over there at that fine institution. Its also where I learned important life lessons such as: any Mormon freshman girl will buy any male over the age of 21 any meal anywhere on campus, in exchange for 30 minutes of attention, or 10 meals for a diamond ring)....anyway, I am thoroughly convinced it was after some serious defense mechanics on my brains part that I agreed to do another 24 hour race...duo none the less.

Looking back, doing a 24 hour race in February is a great way to stay motivated to workout all winter. Granted you can only ride a bicycle in a garage for so many hours before you feel like your brain is either going to explode, implode, or just break up into petite morsels and fall out your nose bit by bit. So it forced us to come up with new training techniques.

My personal favorite December training secret was snowshoeing with a back pack full of diet soda (8 or 9 2-liters is just about right). Everyone should try this. (and by "everyone" I mean everyone with great medical insurance and a desire to grind away enough cartilage to require a double knee replacement within 4 months)

So we trained. We rode 12 hours of Temecula in January as a warm up/training ride 3 weeks before the big race and decided that just maybe we did have the mental characteristics to do a 24 hour race duo (and by "mental characteristics" I am referring to insanity, stubbornness, lack of rational thinking, and sheer stupidity)

Either way we rolled into Tucson, AZ late Thursday night, set up camp and slept with visions of night racing, dancing through our heads. Friday we got up, ate some hearty flap jacks courtesey of Tamer, and went out to preride the course. Relatively flat, nothing too technical, ideal for an ex-roadie like me who struggles with basic mountain bike maneuvers such as "turning".

Saturday we got up, complained about whatever we could find to complain about, tried to pretend like we weren't nervous, and got ready to race. Mark took the first lap and threw down a pretty fast time. Just fast enough to send me off in a hurry as I had a secret (and by "secret" I mean I pretty much told everyone) goal of my own to beat Mark's first time. 1 mile from the finish on my first lap I went through a rough and bumpy section that was just enough to bump my chain apart.

Visions of earlier in the week when I had not snapped the masterlink on my chain all the way, thinking to myself "it'll snap into place the rest of the way as I ride" ran through my head and I cursed my stupidity (not out loud, mind you, I signed the BYU honor code) I got off and pieced my broken chain together and ended up with a time just 2 minutes slower than Marks....about the time it took me to think of every BYU approved cuss word, get my chian tool out and fix the thing.

We continued on the first day, holding steady laps and into the night. Thanks to my dad who was at home watching the results on the internet, I got hourly texts telling us what place we were in. Climbing steadily through the night, we kept the laps steady and even started pulling up on the the first place team. By noon the second day we found ourselves a mere 12 minutes back off the first place team. Not bad after what ended up being 25 hours of racing. We took our 2nd place with pride

The trophies they handed out were pretty much the coolest things ever. But we didn't win, so we just got a cool ceramic tile. Hand painted. And a bit of cash, not bad. Definitely worth going for 1st next year.

Camp Nails 2009

2009-02-02T08:18:00.000-08:00

Thanks to everyone who participated in this years "Camp Nails" it was a huge success. And by success, I mean we got to ride our bikes all day long in shorts and short sleeved jerseys . The kind of days you can only dream about during Utah winters. My cheeks even got a little rosy from the sun. Talk about sweet times in the saddle.
Here's a break down of our intense training camp:

Day 1
Mark and I decided this year to raise the bar on our training camp with an opening day prologue up Woodland Hills Drive on road bikes. We were very aware that by starting such a tough camp with such an intense day would drive a few of the less dedicated riders away, but the point of Camp Nails has never been to coddle the weak. So Friday afternoon the group headed out for probably the toughest Day 1 in Camp Nails history. The group seemed to take the opening flats pretty well. We pushed the pace through Springville and really dropped the hammer in Spanish Fork. We were putting out more watts than the Provo Police Department puts out parking tickets in a whole month. We were laying down speeds fast enough to break the BYU Honor Code. (I haven't read it all the way yet, but I'm pretty sure there's a clause in there regulating how fast you can ride a bike)
Anyway, so we creamed through Spanish Fork with our average pushing at least 15-16 mph. (Probably closer to 16.7, but I really wasn't paying attention) We got to the base of the climb in record time and started the grind up. We knew the climb would be treacherous, but we forged on like truly dedicated cyclists.

Before I knew what was happening, Mark was out of the Saddle and rallying the group. I had no choice but to follow. I dropped a few gears and not only matched his attack, but launched a counter that completely left the group in the dust. I could feel the burn in my legs, but the suffering only pushed me on, giving me the motivation to go harder than I ever had before. As I settled down into a solid pace, my legs felt so strong and I felt so fast I had to actually check my computer to make sure that we were indeed going up hill and gaining elevation. I was on fire. So imagine my surprise when on one of the corners, I see the rest of the group only a bike length away. I could tell Mark was a little put out by my driving the pace so hard with so much of the climb left, but I didn't come to Camp Nails for a tea party and book club discussion, I was here to ride. So ride we did, all the way to the top.

As we reached the summit, a few of the locals were out to watch the finish. They were fully aware of all the glory on the line for whoever reached the top first. Knowing Mark as well as I do, I decided to play it out, and take advantage of one of his only weaknesses: Little Debbie Oatmeal Cream Snack Cakes. As we sprinted for the line I strategically pulled one from my jersey pocket and tossed it to the side of the road. Mark, being the predictable "always thinking with his stomach" typical guy he is, had no choice but to forgo his chance at eternal victory in the hill climb, and stopped to pick up the Little Debbie Snacky Cake.
Despite the questionable tactic employed on my behalf, I felt great about my victory as we started down the hill.

Overall a great group to ride with that day. Some serious hammer heads who drove the pace all the way home, but hey, I didn't get into this sport for fun.

Thanks to all who made it to Day 1, a great opening to Camp Nails 2009

Day 1 Roster:
1. Mark "Nails" Johansen
2. "Fast Dan" Nelson
3. Lil Debbie

Day 2
For the second day we traveled a bit down to St. George, land of the eternal mountain bike trails, sunshine, and retirees in Lincoln Towncars. We headed out Friday night and ended up making the decision as a group to camp out at the parking lot/trail head of the area we would be riding. Despite the fact that we already had a paid reservation at a 26 star luxury hotel/penthouse suite in the business district of downtown St. George, we chose to camp on the dirt, so as to "become one" with the soul of the earth, in order to better improve our own individual spiritual relationships with the dirt we would be spending so much time riding over the course of Camp Nails.

Morning rolled around and as the dawn cracked, we packed up our things and waited for the sun to rise. Our day was to start at the very moment the sun crested the jagged horizon in the eastern distance. Or....maybe we slept in till 9. I really don't remember.

As we rode off, we decided as a group that this was to be the best day of riding ever. Or at least the best day that week.

We started by doing like 21 laps of Zen, give or take 20. We then headed back to the car to meet some of the less dedicated riders who didn't feel the need to get a jump on the day like the rest of us (OK so actually we just forgot to call them to let them know we were already there) and off we went to do several hours on the race course. After what seemed like 10 or 11 or maybe only 1 laps of the race course, we headed out for Barrel Roll and did a few loops out there. As I began to feel the pain of several hours of riding on some rather rugged terrain, I began to respect Craig and John for being total studs, riding on rigid single speeds. I tip my hat to you fellows.

On our way back we even had a little brush in with some celebrities. As we headed back from Barrel Roll, we saw THE Lynda and Dave. We figured they just hadn't ever gone home and had been out riding since last week's Camp Lynda. I tip my hat to you fellows.

After stopping by the car to replenish vital supplies, we headed out for another race course loop and Zen lap. We rode back into town with one last field sprint up a large hill, which, I don't know if you knew this or not, but I'm kind of a big deal, people know me, so I naturally rose to the occasion and once again won the sprint. 60% of the time, I win all the time.

Overall it was a pretty sweet trip. Good friends, good times, and lots of riding. It seemed like such a hard training bout I could hardly believe it had only lasted 2 days. So while I'm now a broken man, trying to recover, I know I will be a better man for it when the racing season hits this spring. I mean in two weeks....

Day 2 Roster:
1. "Captain" Mark "Nails" Johansen
2. "Fast Dan" Nelson
3. "Trouble Maker" Craig Farnsworth
4. "I don't know if he has a nickname" Aaron Smith
5. "Pops" Kevin Johansen
6. "John Boy" "Sabrosa" Hansen
7. Rob "Tamer"
8. The entire Cougarette Dance team

2008-12-03T12:32:00.000-08:00

This won't be funny. At least I'm not planning on it being that way.

I've had an interesting week. It's only half over but I've managed to NOT do a lot more than I actually HAVE done in a whole week's time. I'm sitting at my desk at school, looking at all the books I've collected over the last 6 years; chemistry, physics, physiology, anatomy, biology, nutrition, and my mind rushes back to past times. Times of stress from having to learn insane amounts of information, only to spit it out on a scan tron then forget it the next morning. Times of grief from having to spend beautiful afternoons inside memorizing cellular mechanisms and pretending to understand them as I stumble my way through pages and pages of research. And of course the good times. All the times I left my desk, with papers unwritten, power point slides unstudied, research unread, and quizzes untaken, to take the afternoon off to go pedal my bicycle around Utah county.

I have class right now, but my deep personal soul searching isn't over.....to be continued...

Confessions of an insecure single dude.

2008-10-30T23:08:00.000-07:00

So this last week I finally did the deed. I bit the bullet and got a Utah State driver's license. It's something I was hoping I would never have to do, but in all reality I knew it had to happen eventually. It's kinda like when your at the park with a dog and it takes a poop right at the bottom of the slide. Sure there aren't any kids around at the moment, so you don't have to scoop it up right away, but somewhere in the back of your mind, you KNOW you can't leave that park until you do the deed and scoop the poop.

So that's what I did this week. I scooped the poop and got a Utah license. When I bought a truck this summer my insurance agent (How do you like that? I, Daniel Nelson have an insurance agent. He is very good at finding me cheap insurance. So whereas before I was paying an arm and a leg, he's managed to cut it back to just a little more than a forearm and an ankle.)

Anyway, my buddy Chris who happens to sell insurance, told me when I opened a policy here that I would need to get a Utah license sooner or later....I was hoping later....as in after I'd moved to Colorado, built a log cabin and grown a beard long enough to put the Honor Code office into shock, and make Brigham himself jealous. That was the plan. Little did I know I'd be getting out the scooper this soon.

So as I was sitting there (at the DMV), waiting for Vern (I am only assuming his name was Vern. He seemed to be able to talk about everything and anything like he was an expert on the subject matter. Really the type of guy I always mentally pictured would hang out with Ernest P. Worrell, so I just assumed his name was Vern) to get the camera ready to take my glamor shot picture for the license, I noticed a gorgeous red head.

Red heads, as many of you know, are polar. They are either extremely attractive, or extremely...not. No middle ground on this one. Anyway, this one was gorgeous. (If by some strange coincidence, you are that red head, now reading this, I must first admit I am extremely embarrassed to be writing all this about you. Please stop now, as the rest of this will only embarrass me more. Second I must admit I should very much like to have your phone number)

So there she sat. Red hair and all. As she moved to a counter, a beautiful blonde made her way over and started chatting with the red hed. Here is where the insecure thought process all starts up. (and no, I am not prejudice against dark haired girls. They are equally attractive. One just didn't happen to be at the DMV this particular morning)

For some reason, as soon as these two started chatting, my poor little insecure mind ran wildly along, creating what MUST have been their conversation:

Gorgeous Red Head: Hey, you're good looking, just like me! We should start chatting here in line
Beautiful Blonde: Totally. And look, we're both too good for that boy over there with the white socks and highwater slacks.
Gorgeous Red Head: Like, for sure. He looks like he got his hair cut at Petco. Must have been a buy one get one free dog grooming day.
Beautiful Blonde: He he! Totally. He keeps looking over at us. What, does he think he could ever even hope to posses the level of intelect necessary to converse with us? He probably just failed his Endocrinology test at BYU last Tuesday night.
Gorgeous Red Head: Like, for sure. My rear looks totally good in these jeans right now, doesn't it?
Beautiful Blonde: Totally.
Gorgeous Red Head: I'm so glad we're friends. BFF!!
Beautiful Blonde: Totally. Let's go be friends somewhere else, where that boy will stop staring at us.

And so it goes. I am sure they were actually having a conversation about something serious like the economy, politics, or Paris Hilton's newest shnanigans, but being the ultra self conscious boy that I am, I always just figure everyone is out to judge me for the worst.

I like to think I've come a long way in maturity since the 7th grade. Like how I used to pull girl's hair when I liked them. Now I've moved on to poking them on Facebook. I used to hide my insecurities and self consciousness behind a No Fear, Mossimo, or Gecko brand T-shirt. Now I just put on spandex, very dark sunglasses and ride around on a bike. Definitely made some strides in the maturity department :)

Either way, the point is, mentally, I am still in Jr. High. Maybe that's why I am not married. Maybe that's why I can't seem to pass Endocrinology tests. Maybe that's why I stare at my feet when I am, by some unnatural force, found actually making conversation with a female. Who knows. Maybe its just a phase I'll grow out of sometime in the next 25 year segment of my life. Maybe someday I'll learn "social skills". Maybe someday I'll start communicating with real people instead of writing on a blog....who knows....who knows...

BYU

2008-10-28T20:10:00.000-07:00

I have been in school for too long.
Now I understand that is a very subjective statement. I am in the middle of the first semester of my 6th year of college. A lot of guys go to college for longer. Yeah, they're called doctors. And they go for 4 years, then 4 more, then a bunch of stuff like internships and residencies where they get to call themselves doctors, don't make as much as real doctors, but probably still more than I will after almost as much school.
No, despite the apparent tone of this post, I am not bitter. And no, that last comment was not completely saturated with enough sarcasm to sink the Titanic along with Jack, Rose and the whole crew.

The point of this is that I have been her too long. I understand that many people have been here for longer. I am not trying in any way to say I've been here longer than anybody else. Just that I, for myself, have definitely worn my brain out.

Its like those stupid round rocks you used to get when you were a kid that when you smashed them together, they would spark and make funny smelling smoke. They were awesome. But like all good things, eventually they wore out. My brain is like an expired sparky ball. Worn out. It has lost its capacity to memorize enzymatic reactions, lost its ability to focus on the clinical applications of beta mercaptoethanol and why the inhibition of cAMP causes a myriad of disorders in young female rats with hypo-crap-face-ism.

I realized this today as I went up to take a test in the BYU testing center.

I used to be a chipper fellow every time I went in there. Usually quite well versed on whatever pointless material I had spent hours memorizing. I even used to get comment on my test results screen such as "Congratulations", or "Nice Work" which I am assuming now to mean "Congratulations, you are one hell of a bubble filler-inner" and "Nice work with that no. 2 pencil, good job completely erasing all your changed answers"

But now, I am just bitter. Tonight, I walked up to the counter, handed over my card and asked for my test.
"Which class would you like?" the attendant asked politely.
"PDBio 565" I answered, maybe just a tad less than politely.
"Wow, that's a really high number" the attendant commented excitedly
"Yeah, it means I've been here too long" I replied a tad less than excitedly
He then asked to see my student ID. I showed it to him.
"Wow, this thing is really old" He said grinning
"Yeah, your mom is really old" I said, now very much grinning.

Ok, so I didn't comment on the poor fellow's mother's age, but I was tempted. After getting my test I snuck back to my usual seat in the far back and began filling in bubbles. Sometimes I would read part of the question before filling in a bubble, just so I could get a feel for just what exactly I was being tested on, but most of the time I just went with what felt right.

After the test, I started my walk back to my office. I was feeling pretty angry for being so stupid. Don't get me wrong, I don't think all stupid people should walk around angry, just the ones who used to be smart, but now are stupid. The ones who have always been stupid have no right to be angry about it.

Anyway, I am done ranting now. I'll try to post something funny sometime. I am a lot better at being funny than describing enzymatic reactions in the posterior adrenal cortex in ACTH deficient patients. Or at least hope so. Cause, man, I suck at the latter.

Nebo Thursday

2008-06-24T12:34:00.000-07:00

So deciding to take full advantage of finals week once again, Thursday I went out for a rather epic ride: around Mt. Nebo.

The full loop, starting and finishing in Provo comes out to somewhere between 110 and 120 miles. Make 22 miles of that climbing up Payson canyon and you've got yourself a sweet/fun/long/awesome/beautiful day on a bike.

I planned on leaving around 8:00 am to avoid the summer heat, but yeah, like that ever happens. I managed to be out on the road around 9:30. Just early enough to be back in time for work later that afternoon.

Figuring the ride to take about 7 hours, I was right on pace.

As I left Provo the wind was blowing from the south, a good sign as to how the leg from Nephi back to Payson would be on the return. I have never ridden from Nephi to Payson without a stiff headwind. Oddly enough, the wind managed to change later that day and once again I was stuck making the dreaded stretch with a slight up hill and head wind...very ideal conditions (in case you are slightly confused, please google search "sarcasm")

The 22 mile ride up Payson canyon was beautiful. I wasn't in any kind of hurry to break any records, so I took my sweet time, stopping to take plenty of pictures. The ride down was nice, but like I said earlier, the ride back from Nephi to Payson was a bit monotonous.

Either way, the ride was incredible. Good enough to stop and take my ear phones out and just enjoy the scenery and natural surroundings. It was pretty great just being out there. A small reminder of just what a great planet God has given us to live.

Anyway, here are some more pictures of the ride:
Pictures coming later tonight, I have to go to class now....

I Beat Mark

2008-06-10T19:50:00.000-07:00

The last week or two has brought some significant events in my life, the biggest of which is that I, Dan, beat Mark....twice.
(oh and my little brother got married)

Now I know what you are thinking. It must have been in some obscure contest like how many bananas we could eat in a minute or who had the longest toe nail, but no, really, I beat Mark on a bike, twice.

So yesterday we decide to head out for a nice ride after work. We took off up the canyon and had a pleasant ride up the trail, conversing the whole ride, catching up on everything new.

I hadn't seen Mark in more than a week so it was good to chat for a while filling each other in on new life events, swap a few recipes, and tell him about the new quilt bordering technique I picked up from my aunt while home this weekend. (He called me gay)

Anyway, on our way back we decided to hit up the Country Club Sprint. The Country Club Sprint, for those of you unfamiliar with it, is a slightly uphill quarter mile section of road on University Avenue that starts at a residential turn off and ends at the intersection that goes into the Country Club.

Matt showed me the sprint years ago on a ride before I really knew who he was. Since then Kyle and I would duke it out almost every ride to be the first to the line. I used to beat him soundly, but by the end of our first season racing he was really sticking it to me. Kyle's fast. He can accelerate like a bat out of....a cave.

So yesterday, Mark and I go ahead and have it out on the CCS (Country Club Sprint, for those of you too dim to understand my abbreviation) and I am proud to say I beat him by about a second.

A second may not sound like much, but it's an eternity while in a full out sprint. We were going so fast that distance-wise, I was probably ahead by a good mile and a half...at least.

Needless to say, Mark was very graceful in his defeat. We are very competitive (Ok so I am very competitive, Mark just goes along with it) but we take joy in seeing the other succeed. For example, I was happy as I watched Mark succeed in creaming me in the next two sprints down University Ave and over the viaduct.

Those don't matter. Cause I won the first.

Now, for my second success.

Today, Mark and I decided to go do both our favorite ride ever, the Alpine Loop. (The ride is so official that it is capitalized, very formal)

I didn't know how hard he wanted to drill it, or how hard I would end up wanting to ride, but was more excited just to do my favorite ride with my good buddy.

As we left Provo, the weather quickly decided which way we would go. There was an ridiculously tremendous wind coming from the north, so we opted to ride up the Provo side so we could take advantage of the wind coming back from American Fork.

(I realize that our logic in making this descion was completely erroneous in the proven fact that the wind will ALWAYS change directions as soon as it is time for it to be a tail wind. Anyone doubting this statement will please do a google search on "Murphy's Law")

As we started the climb up to Sundance, we both charged it pretty hard. We stayed together the whole ride, but were both pushing it pretty dang hard. My average heart rate was somewhere around 190 for the 2.25 miles. Either way, we did it in 13 minutes, my fastest time ever.

We kept climbing at a pretty good pace all the way up to the summit. As we got closer, I realized we were right on pace to break 50 minutes for the whole climb.

For those of you unacquainted with the Alpine Loop, the Provo side is about 9 miles long and you gain a few thousand feet in climbing. My previous best time was somewhere around 55 minutes, so breaking 50 would have been a definite success.

As we got closer and closer to the top I really wasn't even paying much attention to Mark. Granted, a large portion of my manhood wanted desperately to beat him as badly as I could, I found myself consumed with a bigger goal: Breaking 50 minutes. We drilled the pace as we got closer and closer to the top. It was going to be close.

As we got to the mile 19 sign, I knew we had about a half mile to go, but less than 3 minutes to do it. I almost gave up when Mark started attacking (Mark knew little of my time goal, he just wanted to beat me) I jumped on his wheel and followed him as long as I could. He surged again and started to leave me.

In a last minute attempt to at least help him push his own pace all the way to the line, I yelled "don't you let up for a second, I'm right on your tail" knowing full well that my legs were spent and I was about to blow.

Well, before you go and get worried now, there is something about me you should know. No matter how long or how hard I have been riding or racing, as soon as I feel close to the finish, I get this crazy reserve kick that takes over my legs. I'm the only guy at the mountain bike races that sprints all out across the finish line completely alone, but its just how I am.

So anyway, just as we were coming around to the last bend in the road, my body's 11th sense picked up the finish line signal and I was off like a bat out of....a cave. I pushed with everything I had and shot past Mark as we crested the hill and rolled across the line. More importantly, however, the whole racing Mark thing pushed us hard enough that we ended up breaking 50 minutes.

Double wins for Dan the Man.

Anyway, we had a great time descending and riding home with the best tailwind ever pushing us all the way back.

Sometimes, somethings don't change.

Mt. Bike Racing Update

2008-05-28T12:45:00.001-07:00

It has been quite a while since I've posted (when hasn't it....)
So here is a general update of my racing season over the last few weeks, including profound personal realizations I have come to realize.

Since the RAWROD I have raced mountain every Saturday. The Intermountain Cup Series gets pretty intense in May with races every week, and the weekly Soldier Hollow Series also starts halfway through May.

After my first mountain bike race down in Hurricane, I was pretty impressed with my result. I got second place in the mens Expert 19-29 category. Visions of quickly upgrading to pro raced through my mind as I got all revved up for the rest of the season.

Then the second race happened.

That changed things. A lot.

I flatted and had some mechanical issues out at that race, leaving me semi-content with a 5th place finish. Not too bad, but just a fluke to finish that far back...I should have won...or so I thought.

The next race up in Logan confirmed my deepest fear: I stink at bike handling.

Uphill sections of the Logan race were ok. I could push myself hard and even pass many riders in the non technical uphill and flat sections. However, the downhill corners proved to be my Achilles Heel.

Just to illustrate my point, sometime halfway through lap 3 of 4 I could hear people starting to pile up behind me on the downhill windy section. A brief conversation occurred which went something like this:

ME: I'm really bad at this downhill stuff...just let me know when you want to pass, dude

INDIVIDUAL BEHIND ME: You're doing fine, hang with it

ME: (realizing the voice behind me was in fact that of a woman...[yeah, an actual girl was about to pass me in a bike race]) I mean, just let me know when you wanna pass, ma'am

INDIVIDUAL BEHIND ME: (slight chuckle) I'm ok, I'll let you know

ME: (In my mind) Oh shiz!

INDIVIDUAL BEHIND ME: (after watching me unclip and put my foot down on a particularly hairy sharp corner) Use your body weight to turn, not your hands

(Yes, the woman biker behind me was actually giving me tips on bike handling in between small outbursts of laughter as she watched me struggle)

INDIVIDUAL BEHIND ME: Look further up the trail, not directly in front of you

ME: Thanks

INDIVIDUAL BEHIND ME: (More hysterical laughter at my plight)

ME: Sorry

INDIVIDUAL BEHIND ME: Ok, good luck, I'm gonna pass you now.

Then, before I could even say anything, she passed me just after a corner and blew by me like I was standing still (which, knowing how poorly I take corners, my being at a complete stop isn't that unlikely)

Fortunately for me and my male ego, I mustered up the energy to gas it on the next straight away and catch the woman, but I swear I could hear her laughing the whole time.

I managed to come in around 7th or 8th. Taken into perspective that really isn't that bad when you consider how big the field was (7 or 8) Ok, so it was that bad

Just to ensure the destruction of any lingering thoughts of confidence in my mountain biking skills, Soldier Hollow confirmed it all with a cute little wreck on one of the downhills (my knee still has a fat owie) and a near to last place finish.

Oh well, its still very fun.

RAWROD Report 2008

2008-05-09T07:52:00.001-07:00

A few weeks ago, I had the incredible chance to ride in the annual RAWROD. Here we all are. I stole this picture from www.fatcyclist.com If there is any kind of copyright issue here you can call my lawyer, Fish.

One of the reasons I've taken two weeks to write up this report on the ride is that for the longest time I could not decide on a witty/informative/catchy title for this post.

Basically, the RAWROD is the Ride Around White Rim in One Day. A 100 mile mountain bike ride down in Moab. A large group of friends, associates, and random guys who somehow get the emails show up to camp out and ride bikes for a weekend late in April. After hearing about it for the last two years, I finally decided I was Mt. Biker enough to join in on the fun.

As mentioned earlier, I couldn't decided on a title for this post, here are several of the potential candidates:

Option #1 Mountain Biking is Really, Really, Really Fun

Basically I had the time of my life out there. It wasn't about riding faster than anyone else, or being better than anyone else, it was about having fun, seeing what I could do, and all in all, just finishing. (The above statement regarding a "non-compete" attitude becomes completely void when considering my only other goal to finishing was to beat Mark Johansen, more on that below)

Lately I have been going through a transition from a roadie to a "dirty" mt biker (as Barrett refers to us) and really had my eyes opened as to how much just plain old fun it can be to ride a bike in a pretty place with no training agenda. A completely novel concept to me.

Option #2 Bike Seats Get Really, Really Hard after 100 miles on the Trail

Ever since I discovered the Selle Italia SLR, I have wondered if my rear could ever appreciate another saddle. After about the first 60 miles last Saturday, I would have gladly traded in my ultra light 135g SLR: for one of the "Big Wide Comfort Seats" found HERE

Such as this one:
I would have gladly carried the extra 13 pounds up every foot of climbing those last 40 miles in exchange for a saddle that didn't feel like it was chaffing off layers of skin so deep I'd need a skin graft to my rear.

In all honesty, I was pretty dang sure I had discovered where the RAW in RAWROD came from.

Option #3 Beating Mark Is All That Matters

Lately I have gotten to be good friends with Mark...or so he thinks. Due to the fact that Mark doesn't even know how to open a "website", or what the internet even is, for that matter, I feel somewhat safe talking a little smack here.

Basically the only reason I am friends with Mark is to find out how to beat him. Beat him at what?

Everything.

I want to be faster on a bike, have a sweeter truck, get bigger muscles, and be cooler than him in general. Pretty much just beat him at the game of life.

Last Saturday was an interesting chapter in the game called "Beat Mark" Here is how the "ride/race" unfolded.

The first quarter (miles 1-25) I was able to hang ok with Mark and John as we left the parking lot, but soon the hammer was dropped, the two started plotting against me, and I got dropped, giving Mark the early Stage 1 "W".

Lucky for me, John's wife and Fish were kind enough to slow down and ride with me for a bit. At the gate to the park we regrouped and after the descent I lit Mark up and took the stage 2 victory. After lunch I rallied it up, feeling pretty dang good from mile 60 to 85.

Good enough to take the W for Stage 3.

Mark, however, was holding a little somthing back for the last 15. He blew me away on the last leg of the ride and up the final 900 foot climb up Horsethief, showing me exactly what he had in those iron limbs of his to take not only the Stage 4 victory, but the overall "W" for the day. (I can't wait till I can finally beat that dude)

Option #4 Friends are Pretty Dang Cool

One of the most important things that happened over the trip was that I realized how much fun it is to have friends (even if you are trying to beat them up every hill)

I had an awesome time driving down with Mark and Shae, riding with lots of people I knew, and even meeting some new friends. I even found myself wishing Kyle was there to share in the fun. The more and more I mountain bike, the more I realize its not about the bike, its about the ride.

Summary:

Here are some stats from the ride:

Total Miles: 99.7
Total Calories Burned: 8614 (A marathon only uses about 2700)
Total Cliff Bars/Blocks consumed: >10 (yuck, no wonder my tummy hurt)
Total Feet of Climbing: ??? (I'll get back on that)
Total Fun Points for the Day: Eleventy-Billion
Pieces of Pizza Mark ate after the ride: Like 20

Well, all I can say is I am excited for next year. I'm already making plans to buy a new seat from Wal-Mart, find some testosterone supplements for my drinks, and Ex-Lax for Mark's.

Sea Otter

2008-04-24T18:38:00.000-07:00

Last week while thousands of BYU students were taking advantage of reading days and finals week, I drove to California.

What better way to prepare for the tests that would determine a large part of my semester grades than to go spend some time somewhere a lot warmer than Utah to race my bike. It makes more sense if you think about it while out riding bikes...

So Tuesday, right after my last class, I took off for California. It was nice drive, other than the sand storms in Utah.
I got up early each day to ride and enjoy the beautiful California scenery.

That wasn't the beautiful scenery, that's just me. Here's some pretty scenery.
My friend Kirsten was kind enough to let me stay with her for a week in Sacramento, about 3 hours away from Monterey.

Thursday we headed down to Monterey for the race, which turned out to be probably the first sunny day of Sea Otter history.

After getting dropped like a sack of rocks at the road race last year, this year I decided to do the circuit race. Kyle tore it up in the circuit race last year, getting 3rd place. The Sea Otter circuit race takes place on the Laguna Seca race motorsport race track, home to several famous races including the famous 1996 race featuring "The Pass"

It was really cool to race bikes on such a sweet course. Each lap was about 2.2 miles and invloved 200 feet of climbing. 200 feet of climbing might not sound like a lot, but it was a pretty dang steep hill. This is the altitude profile of the entire race:

So I lasted about 4 laps with the group before getting dropped right at the top of the hill. I figured I'd driven almost 1,000 miles to race the thing, so there was no way I was going to drop out. I ended up getting 24th of the 30 guys that finished. And that's out of the 55 that started. I didn't feel too bad.

At least I finally got some sweet pictures of me on the road (thanks to Kirsten)

I was going a lot faster in that last picture than you can tell...

Anyway, it was a ton of fun. Getting dropped wasn't, but overall it was a sweet course, a great race, and awesome company.

Mt. Biking is really, really fun.

2008-04-22T08:08:00.000-07:00

Racer and I after the race down at the Cholla Challenge in Huricane, UT

I have always been a roadie. I got my first road bike when I was 14. A 1996 all aluminum Trek 1400. It had some of the first Shimano STI shifters, and a killer "Fire Ice" red paint job. It was worth more than twice my first car I would end up buying a few years later, but it was worth every newspaper I had to wake up at 5 am to deliver to get it.

As time went on I got into racing. I have always owned a mountain bike, but never been a huge fan of the dirt. Rocks, roots, and ruts all kept speeds low and possibility of injury high. I loved the simplicity and speed of the road. So as I made the decision to start training to compete, I naturally gravitated toward road racing, and am about to start my third season as a dedicated "roadie"

Maybe.

I have been having serious thoughts about the whole road racing thing. Not that I haven't loved the last 2 seasons I've competed as a roadie, I've just found something new that is just a tad bit more fun...mountain biking.

I went down last week to Hurricane, UT for my fourth ever mountain bike race. The only 3 I'd done before were an Intermountain Cup Race in Draper last year, a Wednesday night Sundance race, and the 12 hours of Sundance race last September. My experience on the dirt is somewhat limited.

The only reason I even own a mountain bike now is because of cyclo-cross. I like to think of cyclo-cross as a "gateway sport", introducing roadies slowly into the world of off road biking. I never would have even gone off the road if it weren't for cyclo-cross showing me how much fun it can be rolling around in the dirt, grass, sand, and mud (oh, and snow...can't forget the snow)

Anyway, I now own three mountain bikes. (I never use two of them, if anyone wants to buy a full carbon fiber Gary Fisher Caliber, let me know, dang cheap, like under $350)

So last week, down in Hurricane I had an epiphany. As I was out on my second lap, all by myself for a bit, I realized something.....I was having fun. No one else was around, I had absolutely no idea what place I was in, but I was having a blast rolling through the rocks and sand and dirt.Kyle and I after the race. Look at how big our smiles are.

Road racing seems to be all about how much you can suffer. Mountain biking seems to be all about how much fun you can have while riding as hard as you can. Combine that with the fact that you basically have to red-line it for almost 3 hours, and mountain biking really is pretty dang hard as well.

(Being a roadie I wasn't exactly used to riding hard the whole time, just for sporatic bursts to chase down attacks and one big effort at the end)

Anyway, I am seriously rethinking my racing schedule this year...and it will definitely have more mountain biking, cause lets be honest, its really, really fun.

An Awkward Start to an Otherwise Particularly Pleasant Day

2008-04-02T07:48:00.000-07:00

Here is how last Thursday morning unfolded...

This photo has absoultely no relavance to today's post...Pictures just make blogs better

After gently waking to the soothing sounds of Beyonce 4 or 5 times (Cami, I'm telling you, you should replace the baby with an alarm clock with a snooze button...) I got up and left for school.

I didn't have anything too exciting planned for my day, so I decided to ride my cross bike to school. (I'm telling you, I think I've had a small glimpse into the life of a obscenely rich middle-aged man who gets to walk out to his driveway each day and finds himself forced to make the decision of driving the Beamer, the Audi, the Hummer, or the Toyota Carolla)

(Yes, Carolla's ARE a frickin' sweet ride any rich guy's car collection should not be without. I've got a vintage '94 model I'm restoring in my garage. Talk about hot/exotic/commonly underrated cars...)

Anyway, the point of the above diversion, was to address/brag about the issue that on any given day, I have at least 5 different bikes I can choose to ride to school.

(6 If you count the tandem for those nights I feel like bringing a special lady friend home with me for a little....uh...um...ok so I'm not exactly sure what I would do if I ever got a girl over to my house, but I'll keep you posted when I do)

So anyway, I rode to school, rockin' all the way to the sweet sounds of some of my favorite artists. My current "ride to school" mix consists of my five favorite songs at the moment:

-Bonzo's Montreaux (one of the greatest drummers to ever beat around: John Bonham of Led Zeppelin)
-California Love (Dr. Dre/Tupac)
-You've Got a Friend in Me (Randy Newman version from the Toy Story soundrack)
-Beautiful Life Techno Remix (Ace of Base)
-Some Celine Dion song I don't know the name of, just how it goes

So right about the time Celine's singing so loud I swear her vocal cords are going to snap off her epiglottis, I see my buddy Rich. Rich is an avid cyclist, and one of the few people I know that genuinely loves riding bikes for the pure fun of it.

Rich seems to like mountain biking quite a bit, but this particular morning, he was riding his Bianchi road bike.

Now Rich has a very distinct bike. Bianchi has a green color they use for some of their bikes that only they use. Something kinda like this:

So you can see why it was so easy to spot Rich. It's rather easy to pick that bike out in a crowded street.

This all happened as I was turning north on 800 N at Brickoven, just south of BYU campus. Rich was about a block ahead of me, so I hustled my little hiny up to catch my good buddy and say hi.

As I got closer to Rich, I saw his bicycle messenger bag, one rather typical of an avid cyclist, such as Rich was.

I saw he also had headphones in, so I decided to signal my arrival with a gesture common in cycling and (I swear) completely "hetero": a light tap on the bum (in much the same fashion as a "good game" in any other sport)

As Rich turned around to face the attacking "bum swatter" I made a quick observation. This wasn't Rich at all, but some complete stranger who's bum I had just tapped!!

I realized at that moment that I had exactly 2 courses of action to chose from:

(I immediately ruled out the 3rd: pushing the impostor into oncoming traffic. That'd sure teach him to go around fooling people)

1) Stop and explain myself that I simply got confused and mistook him for someone else.

2) Take off and ride away from the situation as hard and fast as my legs could pedal.

Well, like any of you probably would have done, I did what any mature adult would do: I took off like a bat out of hell. I've never ridden so fast in my entire life.

I rode all the way up to the door of the building I was going to, too scared to stop at the bike racks, too scared to even look back to see if he was behind me.

I ran into the building with my bike, headed straight for my office, and shut the door behind me as fast as I could. As long as I couldn't see him anymore, it never happened...right?

The guys in my office, who are pretty used to my slightly odd behavior, didn't say a word. Garrett seemed to notice that I appeared to be in a hurry, (which is quite normal) and was actually at school BEFORE my first class was supposed to start (not very normal) I simply mentioned that I had a good story to tell him later.

So I did. He laughed. I do to (now)

In a nutshell, here are the life lessons/conclusions I've arrived at this week:

Never jump to conclusions
Double check an individual's ID BEFORE the bum swat
Start riding a different bike and wearing different clothes and taking different routes to school everyday if I am going to start tapping random people on the hiny. Or at least a ski mask so as to hide my identity.

Since the incident I've though about ways to rectify the situation. I could:

Forget about the whole thing and just move on with my awkward life
Leave a note on his bike (I've seen where he parks it everyday) explaining the situation
Get everyone I know to start tapping random people on the bum while riding bikes to school in an attempt to start a trend. I will then no longer look like a freak, but a cool trend setter.
Stalk the kid out on Facebook, get his info from the BYU directory, and send him letters etc. from a "secret stalker" so creepy he completely forgets about the insignificant random bum swat

Well, let me know. Vote for which option you think is best in the comments, or come up with your own. Thank you for the input.

Morning Routine

2008-03-18T21:15:00.001-07:00

Warning: This post is kinda long. You might want to break it up into different readings...

Just in case, on the off chance, anyone was wondering, "Just what exactly does Dan do every morning?"
Well I'll tell you.

First off, my alarm does a great job of abruptly jolting me from any kind of pleasant dream I may have been having. (Even mediocre dreams are better than this pathetic lonely life I lead)

Depending on the day, it's either Beyonce's "Crazy in Love" or Kelly Clarkson's "Since You Been Gone" that rings from my alarm and does the deed of killing Dan's slumber time.

After anywhere from 2 to 175 snooze button's later, I drag myself out of my queen size bed. (despite the significantly larger size of the bed, I've spent the previous 26 years of my existence cramped up on sleeping areas ranging in size from a twin to a futon to a couch; needless to say I only use approximately 24% of the total surface area of the queen bed as I sleep curled up in the fetal position)

Now, depending on exactly how many snoozes were utilized, I typically pack up everything I will need for school into my fatty 2000 cubic inches messenger bag. It is made by Chrome bags and is the sturdiest thing ever made. I would recommend one to everyone. Go here to see how spiffy they are.

My first class is either at 8:00 am on Tuesdays and Thursdays, or 9:00 on Mon, Wed, Fri. This is why I have two distinct ringtones.

In the confusion and haze of the early hour, I can never remember what day it is. So to make it easier for my pre-conscious mind to figure out when exactly I have to get up, I have a system:

Kelly Clarkson is the Musical White Female, (she rings on Mon, Wed, Fri) and Beyonce is Too Thin, (Tues, Thurs). In this way I already know what's ahead before I'm even conscious enough to realize I'm trying to roll out of bed into the wall...

So on a typical Monday, I try to get up at 7:30. This gives me time to get all my clothes packed in my bag for school, eat a nutritious breakfast of oatmeal and fruit, shower, shave, and sit around and complain about work/school with my roommate and discuss how much better life would be if everyone just rode bikes around instead of going to work.

I leave for class at 8:30, which gives me 15 minutes for the 3.7 mile bike ride to work and 15 minutes to change once I get there. This, however, is all theoretical. In reality it goes like this:

7:30:00 Kelly begins her 1st love serenade to me

7:30:01 I hit snooze for the 1st time

7:30:09 I'm asleep again already, dreaming of punching Kelly in the kidney much the same way I did to my alarm 8 seconds earlier

7:39:00 Round 2 of alarm singing

7:39:01 Round 2 of snooze button bashing

7:39:09 Round 2 of snooze sleep

The above outlined cycle repeats itself approximately 6-7 more times until I realize it is 8:30; the time I should be leaving for class. I gather together what I can in a rush, fit as many egg sandwiches I can in ziploc bags, throw on some warm clothes for the commute, and rush out the door.

I typically get a text a few minutes after 9:00 as I am usually halfway through my commute from a certain concerned classmate wondering where I am. There are only 4 people in my first class, so it's hard to inconspicuously slip in late...but you can't hate me for trying.

Now, here is the real reason I even started this post. Everyday as I walk into my office, the first thing I do is move the garbage can over and put my bike against the wall. This may seem insignificant to anyone reading this, but I have to move the garbage can EVERYDAY.

Every morning I come in and the garbage can is right there. However, that spot doesn't work for me.
So I move it to here. But every morning I come in and it has moved back to its original spot.

That means that at some point after I leave for the night, someone is moving it back. Now I have my suspicions, and I don't want to jump to any rash conclusions, but I am almost certain it is either a small tribe of miniature gnomes that live under the empty desk, or the nighttime custodial crew.

Either way, the only thing I can think of each morning as I have to move the garbage can back to where I left it when I left is: "Why?"

Now if it is in fact the mischievous gnomes, then it makes sense. Their entire existence is based upon annoying me. Well, gnomes, keep it up. You're fulfilling the purpose of your existence very well.

On the other hand, if it is the nighttime custodial I can't help but wonder why. Not that I (in my completely finite comprehension of the universe) could ever understand something as mysterious as why the custodial crew moves my trash can from where I put it everyday, I have tried.

I would think that the people who use an office day in and day out would know where they like their trash receptacles, but, apparently, custodial knows something I do not, and that is why they move my trash every night. And here are the best possible reasons I could come up with:

1) That garbage can "belongs" against the wall. It is its home. By me moving it away from its home, I am disrupting the very home-life social circle it contributes to.

2) There is some unwritten (or written in a very obscure place like the janitors closet) law that wherever a janitor puts something is where it is "meant" to be and I am challenging their authority as a steward of that building by deciding myself where that can should go.

3) The can is covering a hole in the wall leading to a Fraggle village. (Go here to see what a Fraggle is) (Go here to see them on YouTube)

4) The rotation of the earth speeds up at night just enough so that the garbage can can't keep up and slides back up against the wall. (I'll test this one by putting velcro on the bottom of the trash can this week)

5) I am just going senile in my old age and move it back myself each night as I leave....(Nawwww....)

Anyway, the point of this whole post is why does my garbage can get put back to the same place every night after I move it???

I am planning further testing to determine the limits of this mysterious nighttime relocation. I actually hid the can under the empty desk tonight as I left.

Tomorrow, I am going to put it all the way across the room next to the one by the door. I'll mark it with a sticker to see if the same one gets put back by the wall.

I'm even planning a night where I put it in a completely different room. I am determined to see just how determined this janitor is to making sure there is a garbage can against my wall.

Next week I am going to start throwing away the exact same things everyday in an attempt to confuse said janitor into wondering if he/she is experiencing dejavu, or just going crazy.

(Yeah, and its not going to be normal things, it'll be totally obscure items like old bike parts, tree branches, the same book, the same picture of me with Hillary Clinton, and the same hair brush, everyday)

(Don't ask where I am going to get 5 of each of those things to throw away day after day, but I will, and it will be amusing, this janitor is going to flip his lid)

Anyway, I'm off. I have some research to do...

Super Powers

2008-03-12T12:17:00.000-07:00

I have a confession to make. I, Daniel Nelson, have super powers.

After years of attempting to conceal them, I have made the bold decision to come out of the phone booth (yes, that was a lame attempt at a joke. Don't worry, mature humor is NOT one of my super powers)

This may come as a shock to most of you, but to those of you who know me well, this may be no surprise.

Now, I realize that by going public with this I may only be putting those close to me in danger, but I am prepared to face any consequences that come with my enemies finding out about my super powers.

So here they are, in order of coolness, my super powers:

Invisibility

Yes, believe it or not I can actually turn invisible. I have the ability to be completely unseen. While I have absolutely no control over which moments this happens, I am absolutely positive that there are times I am completely unseen to the natural world.

Case and point. Last week as I rode my bike through Payson, UT, I was almost hit by no less than 84 cars in a single 3 mile stretch. The only explanation for this is that light photons MUST have been passing through my physical body instead of reflecting off, preventing any of the drivers from actually seeing me.

But alas, I have no control over this ability. (Trust me, if I did, I'd spend my time doing much more amusing things than writing about it on a blog) It comes with no warning, and oddly enough, pretty much only when I am on my bike around cars.

Feet in Mouth-ability

Now this one's a real doozy. I can figuratively (not literally, that would be disgusting) fit BOTH my feet in my mouth, at the same time. Yes, it's true. I have the ability to not only say things in public that are moderately embarrassing, but more often than not I do not stop there, I keep going and get the other foot in my mouth, AT THE SAME TIME!

You might imagine this would be slightly socially awkward for me, and, well, yeah, it is.

Statements like:

"Hey, I didn't know you were pregnant"

Followed by comments like:

"Oh, you're not. Well maybe you should get back into that exercise program you were on. Sears has stair steppers on sale this weekend..."

Are pretty much what do it for me. You'd think I'd learn by now. But I don't.

Procrastination

This, perhaps, is actually my strongest power. No matter what it is I have to, or should be doing, I can manage a way to rationalize out of it to do something more amusing. (If I could only control that invisibility thing I don't think I'd ever get anything done...)

For example, right now at this moment, I should be studying for a test I have this afternoon, but no, I am writing a blog on how good I am at not studying for tests I have in the afternoons.

Ironic, I know. Sad, but true.

I can literally find almost ANYTHING to do instead of work that needs to get done. My room gets insanely clean during finals week, because even cleaning my room is more appealing than studying for finals. (If you saw my room any other time you would wonder if "clean" was a status even achievable by such the mess it gets to be)

I can recall nights spent making diet coke and mentos rockets in parking lots, as opposed to studying, rigorous YouTube critiquing instead of reading for class, or wrapping and re-wrapping handlebar tape on my bike while I should have been writing a talk for church. Yup, bone-a-fide procrastinator here.

Well, so there is my confession. Let it bring what may. I hope it doesn't change your opinion of me. I'm still the same guy I was 15 minutes ago, you just know more about me now. Don't judge. If you do, I'll turn invisible and rob your house...if I ever get around to it.

70.3

2008-03-07T23:23:00.001-08:00

So just what exactly does 70.3 mean? Well if you don't know, I'll tell you. And to be honest, even after I do tell you, you probably won't care.

70.3 is how many ml of oxygen per kilogram of body weight my body can use in a minute. Commonly referred to as VO2 Max. You may wonder why on earth this has any relevance to anything. To be honest, not a whole lot. To me, it means a few things:

1) I beat Dave. Dave and I are in the Exercise Physiology masters program at school. Dave is smart. We are really good friends, but we like to beat each other at things.
He beat me on the last anatomy test. By a lot. I beat him on a bike test. By a lot. You tell me what's more important in the real game of life....some lousy school test...or how fast you can pedal a stationary bike in a lab. Yeah, I know, I'm tough.

2) I'm 82% of the athlete Lance Armstrong is. My VO2 max came out at 70 ml/kg/min. His was recorded somewhere around 85 ml/kg/min. I figure that means I should be able to beat 82% of the guys he did..right?

Ok maybe not, but in case you were wondering, here are the numbers of some famous folks

Miguel Indurain: 78
(Spanish cyclist, 1st man to win 5 Tour de France titles in a row '91-'95)

Greg Lemond: 93
(First American cyclist to win the Tour in '86, got shot in a hunting accident and missed '87 & '88, only to come back and win in '89 and '90. Personally, I think he would have kicked Lance's ball up and down the French countryside)

Yo Yo Ma: 57
(Yeah, playing the cello like that takes mad metabolic skill)

Rosanne Bar: 3.6
(To be honest I think I may have exaggerated this number by 2 or 3)

Ok, so you get the idea. Anyway, that is all I have to say about that. I gotta get some good rest so I can win against all the guys on the club ride tomorrow.

Racing Update

2008-03-04T17:17:00.000-08:00

A lot of big things have happened in the last few weeks. I'm gonna talk about them now, cause I guess that is what you do on a blog.

You can't have a blog post without some kind of picture, and I didn't have any good cycling ones from this weekend, so here's one from when I was 6.

A) We went down to Phoenix for the Valley of the Sun Stage race back in February. You can probably tell by the fact that I am just now mentioning it that I didn't win it. I finished mid pack in the Road Race (40th of 88 finishers or so) and a bit worse in the Time Trial (55th??)

I felt ok about my results because I have been riding quite a bit (10-15 hours a week) but have done almost no intensity, (and by "almost no intensity" I really meant "only 3 rides with any kind of speed work") so I didn't feel too bad. It's a long season and there will be plenty of time to ramp up the intensity.

2) I got my USCF upgrade to CAT 2. I was pretty dang excited, (and by "pretty dang excited" I really meant "insanely stoked out of my mind") about the upgrade. It's one step closer to my secret dream of being a pro cyclist.

Its kind of bittersweet, however. As bad as I've wanted to be a semi-pro, now that I've reached the status, I have to start racing/training like one. And to be honest, I'm not as fast in real life as I am in my dreams...

Pretty much I've got my work cut out for me this season, and nothing to lose, so I guess that means its time to rally.

D) We went down to Baker, CA for a race this last weekend and I had my first race as a Cat 2. I got dropped like a sack of bricks. What's worse, is that is was going downhill. Yeah, downhill. Who in the world gets dropped going downhill!!! Yet as we crested the hill and started the descent I just could not get up with the group...it was pretty embarrassing.

3) I think I'm still sick from a month ago. I just don't seem to be able to get rid of this sore throat. It comes back whenever I push it too hard. Maybe it's my wussy side telling me not to ride too hard...I don't know. All I know is that I wish it was warm outside, and that I could ride hard without feeling like my throat was going to burn a hole through my larynx.

G) I wish I didn't know what a larynx was. I have an anatomy test tomorrow and instead of studying for it, I am on here venting. I'm banking on the fact that my professor doesn't read student blogs, so when I go in tomorrow asking for an extension on the test, he won't know its cause I spent the night goofing off on my blog, instead of baking waffles for widows at the shelter like I'll probably tell him...

(just kidding, I go to BYU, abide by the honor code to the fullest, and have never lied)

[ok so the never lie thing might be a lie, but don't worry, I'm not going to lie to my professor, if he asks, I'll outright tell him I was wasting my night away on a blog instead of memorizing lower leg cutaneous innervations]

Catching Up

2008-02-25T09:26:00.000-08:00

I have a lot of catching up to do. I haven't posted anything for a while, so I feel there is a bit to catch up on. Not that anyone has been dying from lack of Dan-Blog, but I'll try to get updated here.

New Ride

First off, I am pretty sure Valentine's day this year was the best ever. I took Buena out for several hours in the warm sunshine of Scottsdale, AZ. We had a wonderful time. (Buena is my new smokin' hot bike) here she is stripped down:Talk about a sweet ride. She's a Lemond Buenos Aires (Hence the name Buena. Does anybody else out there actually name their bikes???)

So she's built up with all my old parts from Felt ("Felt", oddly enough was a Felt brand bicycle, obviously not one of my more creative/imaginative names. One day I'll do a post on all my bikes and how they got their names....yeah, I can just hear the excitement in you eyes as you merely think about reading all about that)

Anyway, so I've been pretty stoked about the new frame. She handles like a champ and weighs less than steaks I've eaten in one sitting (950 grams to be exact..slightly less than the combined weight of the Olsen twins. Lance was always very weight conscience in his selection of bike parts, who knew it would carry over to his selection of women )
I can just imagine an after dinner conversation:

Lance: Hey Olsen Twin, I think we can shave about 35 grams if we cut your hair 3 inches shorter

Olsen Twin: You got it, dude!

Lance: And guess what else, if we got a chisel big enough, we could get some of that perma-stuck makeup you and your sister sell off your face to save another 454 grams.

Olsen Twin: You're in big twouble mister!

Ok, sorry for the diversion, I couldn't resist. Point of the story is that Buena is light, and fast, and pretty. She's kind of a project in work, however. Ever so slowly, over the next few months and as money becomes available, she will be getting upgraded to a full SRAM Red gruppo, new 2008 Race X Lite wheels, along with a few other hand selected tweaks.

That is all I have to say now. I'll finish the rest of the updates in a bit.

Don't forget to check out my ultra-whiny post on V-day, I finally finished it.

My thoughts on Valentines Day.

2008-02-06T09:14:00.001-08:00

A single guy's thoughts on Valentine's Day...

Ok, so here they are.
We live in a world, where the "have's" love to show off what they have to not only the "have not's" but also the other "have's". You can see this quite evidently in just about every aspect of life. Look at what kind of car people with money drive. I saw this first hand when we were down in Scottsdale this last week. Why on earth would you spend over $100,000 on a car unless it was to show what you had. Yet I saw more than one Ferrari, Bentley, Hummer, that I highly doubt were purchased for their "functional" aspect. They were purchased by the owners to show what they had.

I can tell you are already thinking that I am a hypocrite, and yes, you are right. I happen to have a nice bike that I like to show off. I have even been known to make a purchase of two in my life that maybe wasn't made on the basis of function, but more looks. (I once special ordered a seat from Colorado for full retail price just to get one that was the right color to match the yellow highlights on my bike. And the fact that I am even telling you this furthers my point even more)

The point is people generally like to be seen with what they have. It must be some kind of self esteem builder. Letterman's jacket sales across the nation are another prime example of this principle. Who really cares, other than the wearer of the jacket, that you lettered in debate, drill team, and football all in the same semester?

(once again, I make no claim to be exempt from this principle, I put patches on my jacket for anything I could possibly think of and wore the thing everyday, probably even to church if my parents would have let me, I had a blue tie I really think would have looked good with it)

So that is all Valentine's day is. Some lady back in the day decided to come up with one more way to flaunt what she had; a guy wrapped around her finger so tight he'd fork over whatever amount of money he had to to "show her how he felt".

(PS No, I am not bitter or anything)

Anyway, so what do girls want for Valentine's day? A small note expressing how much she is appreciated and loved, or a freakin' giant stuffed animal with balloons and flowers she "has" to carry around all day only to draw attention to what she has...a man wound around her finger. You tell me.

The best part of the whole thing is that we've associated it with a religious figure. (St. Valentine, who I can assure you would be rolling over in his grave if he even knew what his male descendants were being duped into doing)

I guess that is all I have to say about that. And no, I do not wonder why I am single, I am fully aware of several of the reasons.

PS The whole wedding ring thing falls under the exact same idea.

Squaw Peak in a Basement

2008-02-02T21:28:00.000-08:00

Last Thursday I rode Squaw Peak.

This may seem odd to anyone who is aware of a few key points

It is February
Squaw Peak road is covered in several feet of snow
I had split pea soup for lunch on Thursday

While the 3rd point actually has nothing to do with the ride, the snow did. You see, I actually rode Squaw in Aaron's basement.

I realize some of you may be thinking that I've taken this whole mental visualization concept a bit too far, but no, I really did climb 1600 ft over 4 miles.

My buddy Aaron recently started an intense training company where he goes to people's houses, tests their physical abilities, and helps them train for things like cycling, running, fly fishing, and even triathlon (Author's note: Triathlon currently ranks 41.2 notches below fly fishing on the "Scale of All-Time Coolest Sports")

Anyway, with this new business he's started, he has also acquired computer equipment you can attach to your bike while you ride inside which controls your resistance and such. After entering such vital information as your age, height, weight, marital status, and shoe size the computer can generate virtual rides.

(Shoe size actually has nothing to do with anything. Marital status, on the other hand changes the programming significantly. Due to immense decreases in physical fitness after marriage, the computer lightens all resistance by 94% to even it all up)

So of course we had to program in Squaw Peak. Granted it is all the work without any of the view, which is pretty much what makes the whole ride worth the pain, but that is besides the point.

The point is how cool it was to be virtually climbing a mountain in February.

To answer your next question, no, I did not break any records this time around. I know what you are thinking. Something along these lines:

"But Dan, you've been lifting weights all winter to the point that you have to find fat freshmen to sit on the leg press machine to get enough weight to actually get a workout. Shouldn't you be able to ride up Squaw with one leg faster than that Killer Hiller kid yet?"

To answer your thoughts, no. No, I can't. And to be honest, I probably never will. Kyle "Killer Hiller" will forever hold the Squaw Peak record between the two of us. For a while it bounced between the two of us, until that fateful Saturday afternoon back in October of 2006 when Kyle laid down a whopping 23 minute burn up the hill to beat my previous best by more than a minute and a half.

Needless to say he's held it ever since. However, now that's he's married he should try the computer simulation. With that "marriage bonus" he could quite possibly break the 20 minute mark...if he could just get his body fat back down to 3% (Since getting married Kyle's body fat has rocketed up to an obese 6%)

Either way, I hope the points of today's post are clear:

Winter stinks for training
Riding inside is more fun when you are hooked up to a computer
Marriage makes you slow
Squaw Peak is important to Provo in ways other than enabling freshmen girls to get out of the VL club (you know who I am referring to)
Split pea soup and shoe size have nothing to do with anything

Well, I'm off to find a computer program that lets you set up virtual rides consisting of 24 miles of downhill.

New Diggs

2008-01-24T08:25:00.000-08:00

I am no longer homeless. To be completely honest, I don't even miss being homeless. I thought it might be kinda fun for a bit, living on the edge. Be in all reality, it's that same kind of fun that comes with riding your bike really fast across a large icy patch; a bit exciting at first, but when its all over, nice to be back on solid ground.

And so here I am on solid ground. It really is nice to not only have a place to call home again, but a pretty dang nice place at that. Throughout my time here in Provo, I have managed to find incredibly cheap housing. As you can guess, I have gotten exactly what I have paid for.

Some highlights of my past housing arrangements have included:

Living in the basement furnace/heater/pipe room where the radiator pipes that heat the whole house ran all through the room and 3 feet from my face while I slept. I had to wear those little goggles they give you at tanning salons just to sleep at night.
Living in a house so old the bathtub had feet. Not little feet like a table, but actual clawed feet like an eagle would use to scoop up unsuspecting fish out of a lake for supper.
That same house had an incredibly efficient heater. So efficient, in fact, the property management people decided to lock it on throughout the months of June to August. This worked out well on the summer nights when I got a bit chilly and the temperature dropped to 89 degrees. That heater was right there to ensure my home stayed in the comfy zone of 190 to 240 degrees.
Cinderblock walls at Cinnamon Tree. Enough said.
Last of all, the list topper would have to of been the caving in ceiling in the house that did have a washer and a dryer, just across the room from each other...in the kitchen...next to the slanted pool table...in the room next the the fireplace we used to burn the excess trash that would not fit into the overflowing garbage can we all seemed to forget to take to the curb every week. I am 98% confident things were burned in that fireplace that gave off fumes toxic enough to pollute every drop of water contained in the great lakes 7 times over.

With that said, I must admit I really have enjoyed the adventure known as college housing in Provo. (in case anyone from the Provo Residential Zoning department or BYU Housing department does in fact somehow stumble across any of the above information, please keep in mind the statute of limitations on any of the implied above violations)

And now on to the new place:
Here is our living room with our new futon.
Here is the view from the futon. Since we don't have a TV yet, we like to sit down and watch the TV stand. Or we'll watch the cycling posters we haven't hung up yet that we just lean against the walls
Here's just another shot of our living room.

Moving into such a nice place has inspired me to raise the bar of neatness and cleanliness. A few of these changes/goals include:

Removing shoes before coming in
Cleaning the kitchen and all involved dishes within 1 month of the meal they were originally used for
Making my bed each morning
Taking the time to put everything away in it's place. (And just maybe perhaps it's "place" happens to be on the floor, next to like 20 other things that all happen to be their "place")
Showering more than 3 times a week. Ok so that's been a goal for a while now. With so many other fun things to do, like computer programming and WarCraft, regular showers are tough to get in. (PS Kyle, I just so happen to have the incredibly chiseled body I do, thanks to hours and hours of sitting with good posture while playing SimCity 2000)

Ok, so in all reality, the best part of the new house is the garage. I don't have a picture of it yet because every time I go down to take a picture of it, I get distracted by the bikes. Yes, we finally have a garage big enough for ALL our bikes. It 's like a little piece of heaven right here in south Provo.

Another great aspect of the place is that its about 4 miles from BYU campus, making for a lot longer bike commute to school. I like riding bikes so I like the extra time on the road each day. Better than that even, the first day I even rode to school, my good buddy/teammate/rival/life coach/role model saw me riding and thought I was tough. Kinda.

Well anyway, I'm off to go do something tough, like make my bed

An Open Letter to My Loyal Readers

2008-01-16T22:36:00.000-08:00

Note from the Author: This will be the first of many "Open Letters". I got the idea from a guy who knows how to blog better than us all...

Dear Loyal Fans,
I must begin this letter by first, honestly admitting I never knew you existed. Up until yesterday I really didn't even think my blog was read by anyone other than the Quality Control guy at blogger.com who has the lousy job of reading random blogs to make sure people aren't posting things they shouldn't, like immodest pictures of people in spandex biker shorts.

However, due to certain comments, I am now aware you exist. Thanks to "benson" (Who are you? Do I even know you?) and "austin" and their willingness to be heard, I now know that more than 3 people read this blog. Sure, as I write I imagine thousands upon thousands of people across the country are reading and appreciating my wit, epic bike stories, and random thoughts, and can't wait for more, but even I have a realistic enough approach to life to realize even my own mom won't read this unless I specifically tell her about a particular post. With that said, however many of you are out there, I thank you for being Loyal Readers.

Now, on with the update.

For all of you who are dying to know how many times I fell off the rollers while attempting to ride a TT bike on them, the answer is 0. Yes, zero. I didn't fall once. I would say the biggest reason why I didn't fall was because I haven't tried yet.

After bumping into a couple of Tri-Guys, (certainly a great group of guys, good friends from the shop, men I admire, but alas, they are after all Tri-Guys) they convinced me of how difficult it was to ride on rollers while down in the aero bars. Being the gung-ho go gettem kinda guy that I am, I decided I would try later, and just rode the TT bike on a fixed trainer. I'll post more on that later.

So with the first race only 28 days, 23 hours, 53 minutes away, I must admit for the first time, training is going great. I've been hitting my lifting goals, riding inside whenever the weather is bad, and have a good base under my legs. With that in mind, here are the bits of drama in my life as of now. For those who don't care, don't even bother to finish reading the post, there'll be nothing good after the boring stuff.

Homeless.

I've been homeless for the last week and a half. In an attempt to save a bit of money for new bike parts, I moved out of my old house way too soon. My new place won't be open until this upcoming weekend (or so we hope) bringing Dan's Total Homeless time to just over 2 weeks.

I've adapted quite nicely.

I shower at school, sleep on couches, and keep a change of clothing or two in my car. The best part of being a PE teacher here at BYU is that I can basically wear the same thing to school everyday, and no one says anything, bringing Dan's Total Changes in wardrobe to 3. Not bad for a 10 day span. (Mom, in case you are reading this, don't worry, I do change the unders everyday)

Next:

In case you didn't know, I had a girlfriend once. Yes, it's true. I've made mention a time or two on here about getting dumped last year, but it actually happened. You wonder why I bought a full carbon fiber bike with Dura-Ace parts worth more than my car last spring...it was my rebound. I got canned like an old diaper.

Don't worry. I'm not bitter anymore, but it sure did fuel me up more than a few steep hills last year. Time passes. Emotions fade. Pain subsides.

Now here is where it gets interesting. I've never been one to put anything personal on a blog, but hey why not give the blogger.com Quality Control guy something interesting to read tonight. This girl who canned me almost a year ago, has been calling again. We've hung out recently, and had a good time catching up and chatting, but lets be honest, to go from seriously dating, to nothing, back to buds is a bit to fathom. Austin, here's you chance to counsel...

So with that said, that is all I have to say. I've probably said too much, but hey, when has there ever been a time Dan didn't say too much. Yeah not ever, really.

Well Loyal Readers, chew on that and let me know what you think.

Countdown to Fun

2008-01-15T17:35:00.000-08:00

The countdown has officially begun. According to the widget on my desktop, only 30 days, 5 hours, and 23 minutes until the first big race of the season, Valley of the Sun. I feel like a little kid counting down the days till Christmas. Only better, because it'll be 2 whole days of bike racing instead of 1 quick hour of opening presents, which typically I spend the majority of trying to sound interested in what someone else got, when really all I can think of is trying to figure out what my next present will be. I guess it's more like a selfish Christmas. Either way, it's less than a month away.

With that said, I feel the need to address the fact that some rather significant things have been unraveling in my life outside of cycling.

Ok, good. Now that I've got that out of my system, back to the real update.

So this bike race next month. It's down in Phoenix, AZ. Should be good weather. Which is the thing that makes me worry. While I've been up in Utah, riding inside 5 days a week due to excessive cold and icy roads, those pansy boys have been down in Arizona training all winter in warm weather. The few times I do get outside to ride, it's like 20 degrees out! Where is the equality in that? Maybe when I get down to the lower elevation and warmer weather, my legs won't be big enough to hold all the oxygen my lungs will be pumping into them and I'll blow off the front so fast no one will even think about reeling me back in.

Or not....

Maybe what'll happen is that my body goes into shock when I'm forced to ride faster than the 15 mph I've been riding at the last 4 months, and I fall off that back of the pack as we roll off the start line...

Or not...

Either way I'm getting ready to do what damage I can. The race consists of a Time Trial on Friday the 15th and a Road Race Saturday the 16th. There's a crit on Sunday, but I'm still holding strong in my conviction to not race my bike on Sunday. Maybe when I start making gobs and gobs of money like Steve Young I'll start. Until then I'll just keep trying to get one of those questions in Sunday School right. (One day...one day...)

Anyway, I'll keep the updates rolling out, now that I have something to update. I'll definitely have to let you know how the Time Trial bike on rollers turns out.

And maybe a bit about all the other new drama in my life....

Or not...

2007 in Review: Do's and Don't's of an Amateur Cyclist

2007-12-30T20:12:00.000-08:00

2007. What a year. As I sit here and think back on the last year as it has gone by, I can't help but think how good it was. I got a few sweet new bikes, won a few races, went on an actual date with a girl, and even ended up the 4th ranked amateur in the nation. With that said, it probably could have been better.

And so for the benefit of all you aspiring amateur cyclists (and fans) out there, I have decided to do a quick summary of 2007 in a "Do's and Don't's" format, to help you learn from my successes, (I am kinda sure there was more than one) and avoid my mistakes (I am definitely sure there was more than one)

DO: Train in the off season. I didn't. From Jan to March I don't think I got in a ride longer than and hour. I over trained in April to try to make up for it, which led to a great first half of the season, but a bad burnout mid-July.

DON'T: Base your diet on 5 Buck pizza and chocolate milk. I know it sounds appealing, but the guys who made the food pyramid were on to something when they put grains at the bottom, and chocolate milk and pizza at the top. As fast as I really wanted to be going up hills this summer, I really can't say that consuming my body weight in pizza and chocolate milk on a daily basis helped in my dream of being a climber...

DO: Take chances. This applies to all aspects of life. I recently watched a very lame movie with one really good line: "The things that scare us the most are what end up being the most worthwhile." I've never been a risk taker, but perhaps one of my greatest moments in my short history of racing was this summer at Bear Lake.

A small group of riders broke away at mile 20. There were still 80 miles left to race. Almost no chance to hold off the pack for that long. For the first time in my life I took a risk. I went off on the attack and to this day still don't know how, but a small group of 5 of us managed to hold off the peleton almost the entire race, never getting more than a few minutes lead. In the last 2 miles all but 2 of us were caught.

With only 1 kilometer to go, I took off, pumping every ounce of energy I had into my fatigued legs. I punched open a 20 second gap on second place, and went on the win the race. I've never been so excited in my life. Never worked so hard, and never felt better. The feeling of burning down the last 500 meters knowing I had held off a field of 50 riders will be one I will never forget.
Prize money from the race

If I could only work that hard on getting married...

DON'T: Quit. Ever. No, really, don't. It's not worth it. The pain you feel for a moment is nothing compared to the pain you feel forever, knowing you gave up.

My lowest point this summer was after a race in Idaho. I went out on a few attacks too early, was quite a bit over confident in my ability, and pretty much baked my legs in the first 2 laps of a 4 lap race. As the 3rd lap started up the hill, I gave up. I gave myself every excuse in the book and rationalized my way into not trying. I soon fell off the back of the pack and finished the race completely alone.

I was so far back they didn't even give me a time, just a "Did Not Finish" status on the results sheet. To my credit I did at least finish the race, but I gave up. I quit trying. And as bad as it hurt then pushing it up the hill, it hurts even worse now knowing I made the choice to quit.

Do: Keep your priorities straight. Contrary to popular belief, cycling is not the highest priority in my life. My family comes first. As bad as I want to someday reach pro status, I want even more to be a good brother, son, and eventual husband and father. I can't say I've always been the best at letting my actions reflect this, but the older I get, the more I see how important it is to spend time with my family.

As trips home get further apart and shorter in length, I can't help but wish I could be around them more. As much fun as cycling is, it should never come in front of religion or family. (Which is why I've put in a petition to start a new program called "Church on Wheels", ask me about it if you have any questions)

Don't: Get cocky. This one definitely does NOT apply to me. Seeing how I'm pretty much the fastest kid on a bike I don't have to worry at all. When you're the best, well, enough said. This tid-bid is for all you out there who think you are good, but not as good as me. It's important to note that no matter how you try, you just won't be as fast as I am, so don't think you ever will.

As a 16 year old kid passed me going up the final climb of the state championship race this summer, I told him this. He kinda laughed and gave me a cocky smile. As I was explaining this to another kid, the 17 year old who roasted me every race in cyclocross, he kinda laughed to and gave me the same cocky grin. If you wanna read all about it I am sure you can read their blog at
www.Im.a.young.kid.who.likes.to.whoop.up.on.26.year.old.insecure.idiots.com
Its actually pretty good.

Well with that said, I've made my New Year's resolutions. I'm off now to go beat up those teenagers to show them I'm better than them...

18 Degrees of Glory...Fahrenheit

2007-12-16T21:37:00.000-08:00

Stopped for lunch

Saturdays were invented for cycling. Don't let any of those married people try and tell you they are for yard work, cleaning, or catching up on projects. Especially don't let anyone tell you they are for school work. Just as Sunday has been set aside as a day of rest and spiritual rejuvenation, Saturdays were built around the fact that the rest of the week gets cluttered with all the nonsense of life, and Saturday was dedicated to riding bicycles. Its true, I looked it up on the Internet.

With that clarified, I feel the need to self righteously brag to all you (ok so " to all of you" may be an overestimate, how about "to both of you") who read this that last year I only missed riding on 5 Saturdays out of the whole year. I feel justified in the fact that one missed day was due to the fact that I had had hand surgery two days prior and was so doped up on Loritab I couldn't figure out how to get my bike onto my indoor riding stand (but heaven knows I tried), another was due to a severe gluteal bruise from a wicked mt bike wreck (ok so I fell trying to impress someone on campus by riding up stairs and ended up falling back on my seat...hard....but man were they impressed). Another was missed due to (this one's the killer) a girl. Yeah, believe it or not, I actually skipped a Saturday ride to spend time with a girl. Every Achilles has his heel, and apparently girls were mine that week. Turns out I do have a soft side deep inside this hardened front I put on. I've since reformed.

As for the other 2 missed days I am pretty sure I was at home in WA during different weekends without a bike to ride or busy doing family things (which believe it or not actually ARE more important than cycling to me) Bikes are fun, but my mom, dad and brothers mean so much more.

Now I am pretty dang sure you wanted to know all of that. And that's good, cause i spent a whopping 5 minutes of my life typing it.

Now to this Saturdays ride. As cyclocross is now over, it's back to training on the road for the upcoming road season. First race is February 15-16, down in Phoenix. It's a big national stage race with people coming in from all over the country (hence the "national" in "national stage race") It is pretty early in the season, but possible to do well if you have a good off season. Which is what I am doing now, having a good off-season. Much better than last year's (due to a certain distraction we'll call "XX Chromosome," my off-season last year ended up being just that, off) Well since last winter some key events have taken place that bring me to where I am today. I got dumped, I got a new bike, I got bitter, I got faster. I guess that is all there is to it.

So, again, back to this Saturday's ride (I'm just as scatterbrained and random in my writing as I am in my real face to face conversations) It was cold. The temp in Provo was listed as 18 degrees according to Yahoo Weather when I woke up Sat morning (that's about 7 degrees Celsius for our international readers). I don't care who you are, that's cold. So I bundled up and took off to meet the guys. It's days like that that bring out the "Lifers", as Jason put it. We spun out for the West Mountain ride and ended up having a great time. Matt "Danish Blood" M. won the "I'm so tough I only wear one layer in the dead of December" award. What a champ. The rest of us were nicely bundled. Bundled up like eskimos

We took a lunch in Payson and got home in the afternoon. Overall a great day on the bike.I figure that since this is what I get to stare at for most of the day, you should to. No, dad, I didn't take this picture while riding my bike...at least not through traffic.

Christmas Song

2007-12-16T12:04:00.000-08:00

Warning:
There is absolutely no mention of any type of cycling anywhere in this post. I realize this is totally out of character and wouldn't be surprised if I get a ton of hate mail for it, but I just had to make a quick post.
As Mike, my roommate, and I were sitting in the living room today chatting with Brittany, his girlfriend, I started singing:
ME: Oh, the weather outside is frightful
MIKE: But Brittany is so delightful
ME: Well I really don't think so
MIKE: You wouldn't know, you wouldn't know, you wouldn't know
And that is all I have to say just now. I will post some pictures and notes on yesterday's epic freezing cold bike ride (there, I got in something on cycling) later. Maybe Tuesday when I am home.

Cross Video

2007-12-11T19:32:00.000-08:00

I do realize that the title "Cross Video" may attract more drag queens than I really want watching me in spandex, but maybe it'll convert them to a "straighter" hobby. Here is just the video for now, I'll post an update when I have more time.

Hand Tossed, White Washed, Cyclocross

2007-12-01T18:52:00.000-08:00

Cyclocross. Now there is a sport. Intentionally designed to pit riders against the elements in the harshest conditions, cyclocross events are known to send bikes and riders home full of rain, mud, snow, sand, vegetation, and any other natural nuisance you can imagine. Originating in Europe as a way to train in the off season, cycloscross started as a fun sport where riders had to simply get from one town to the next, crossing fields, fences, farms, gullies, groves, granges, hills, hurdles, homesteads, rivers, ranches, roads, swamps, sticks, and stones. (No, I have no idea what a "grange" is, it just seemed to fit the pattern of alliteration. .) See the ever faithful Wikipedia for more info on the sport.
So this season has been interesting as far as cyclocross. I've been trying the singlespeed category out for a change and have been loving it like crazy. Most of the guys who race singlespeed are pretty serious so I never seem to manage a finishing spot in the front half. (Except for 2 weeks ago at the State Championships, I pulled my best finish of the year placing 7th, but only because a few of the riders who consistently beat me were out of town at the National Championship race in Oregon) Add that to the array of health problems that have been plaguing me since mid August and it makes for a mediocre cross season at best.
Well at any rate, as you may know, about 6+ inches of snow fell today up in Salt Lake, making for some pretty crazy cyclocross conditions. I got to the race about 20 minutes before the start, just in time to do about 2 warm up laps (although I would hardly say any actual "warming up" occurred, it was colder than snot and dumping snow, so we'll just call them "course familiarization" laps) Due to my lack of aggression, I ended up toward the back of the field off the start line, pretty much scared to death of riding in the snow. However, my cautious nature paid off as I watched several of the more aggressive riders dive headfirst into bushes and trees on the first corner. I had several close calls, and unintentional dismounts, but I am proud to say I lasted the whole race with no major "eat it" occurrences. And thanks to my goodest friend Alison, I have several pictures to show for my efforts today.In case any spectacular single men are reading this, here is my sweet friend Alison, she's great, single, amazing, getting her doctorate in physical therapy, athletic, funny, intellegent, generous, loyal, and pretty much the best photographer to ever touch a camera. I hear she has a spot or two open in her busy social calender still, so let me know if I can help you out and try and get you a spot before it fills up fast :)

Right as I am about to pass him on the inside (OK, so I think he really just passed me on the outside)The snow was really coming down, but yeah, I managed to take the corners like a pro.Running over the hurdles like a champ.

12-3=9 Hours of Sundance

2007-10-01T22:00:00.001-07:00

The 12 Hours of Sundance was back in September. I'm just now posting the blog:

So the two best things about riding bikes is racing, and spending time with good friends. Naturally then the 12 Hours of Sundance mountain bike team relay race would be the perfect event. When I heard about the race I called up my best buddy Kyle (who has since lost a few points in the friendship ranking scale due to the fact that he totally sold me out and got married this last summer) Our conversation went something like this:
Kyle: Hey
Dan: Hey
Kyle: What do you want, I'm really busy doing a 3-D puzzle with my wife
Dan: There's a bike race next week.
Kyle: I remember when we used to do those. I do 3-D puzzles now with my wife.
Dan: So I've heard. Anyway, it's a 12 hour race. Let's do a 2 man team
Kyle: Sounds good, but I think I might be a bit out of shape, these puzzles don't seem to keep me in shape like cycling did.
Dan: So I've heard. Anyway remember, Kyle, how your bike handling skills make you twice as fast as me even when I am in better shape?
Kyle: Oh yeah. Let's do it. I'll bring SlimFast for us to drink.
Dan: Deal.

And so we embarked on the adventure known as the 12 Hours of Sundance. We were both so excited for the race that we all camped out the night before. Anwyay, so here's how the race worked:
Each team would have one rider out racing the loop at any given time. The course was a 8 mile loop that took 40 minutes or so to ride. A rider could do as many laps as they liked before switching the baton off to their teammate. Kyle and I after much discussion decided that between his out of shapeness and my lack of mountain biking skills, one lap each would be just fine. And so we went, alternating laps, and having a darn good time. The only problem was that as excited as I was to race bikes with Kyle, the only time I saw him was for 10 seconds at a time as he would come in to finish his lap, and I would go off to start mine in the transition zone. Granted, we did maximize those short moments of social interaction with such stimulating conversation topics as how bad my back hurt, or how cold Kyle's face was, but it really wasn't the same as a good old sit back and relax conversation over a cold glass of Gatorade like we used to.

Now here's where the real drama starts. The race was planned to start at 7:00 am and go till 7:00 pm, with each team doing as many laps as they could in the given time. Well a little after noon, it started to rain, which is fine in a mountain bike race. In fact, a bit of weather makes racing off road a bit more fun (and by a bit of weather I am not including blizzards like the one Sam and I encountered that one time we rode LOTOJA in 2005) Either way, the rain was off and on for a few hours until finally around 3:00 pm, it started raining so hard the trail became a mess of mud thicker and stickier than the stuff they called beans in the MTC. The mud became so bad bikes would no longer roll. Riders were having to get off and run not only up but down some of the hills, truly defeating the whole purpose of it being a bike race. (for those interested in Muddy Foot Races with a Bike on Your Back, check out www.muddyfootraceswithabikeonyourback.com, but they really aren't as fun as good old mountain bike races)

So anyway, with the mud getting worse, and the temperature dropping, I feel it appropriate to point out that I had the the insanely good fortune to be in the tent resting while the weather was weathering. Don't think I am a jerk, but I was quite glad Kyle was the one out in the 6 foot mud waves, not because I dislike Kyle, but because it meant I wasn't out in it. Before you give up on me as a friend, I'll have you know that as we waited for Kyle to come back from his muddy lap, I was busy getting the car heater on, laying out dry clothes for Kyle to put on, and heating up some hot chocolate for him to sip as he nuzzled up with his wife in the tent. Yeah, mark up 23 friend points for Dan.

Well, while this is all going on, the race organizers decided to cancel the race. A few folks were upset, but I'd be willing to bet the fancy 3rd place medals Kyle and I won they weren't the people who had to ride in the mud. So after 4:00 pm, no more riders were allowed to go out, 3 hours short of the 12 hours mark, making it the 9 Hours of Sundance.
Kyle and I ended up in 3rd place getting beat my 2 teams of guys who all race pro, so we felt pretty good about that. In fact, here is a picture of the medal:
What better background than Old Glory and the bike stand in my living room.

Here is a picture of Kyle after he got back from the mud lap: Notice how happy he is despite the fact he just hiked most of the lap through mud 84 feet deep.
-Below to the left is a picture of our good buddy Chad's bike. He managed to rip his derailleur clean off the hanger due to the deadly combination of excess mud build up, and ridiculously strong leg power.

-Up top is a picture of me, waiting so patiently all bundled up to go ride my lap.
-Finally a picture of Aaron, me, and Kyle after the race.

Jumped on the Blog-Wagon

2007-09-26T11:22:00.000-07:00

So despite my best efforts to avoid popular trends (I never had a bull-cut, M.C. Hammer pants, or a slap bracelet), I've decided the idea of posting blogs online is actually quite practical for several reasons. 1st off, I don't have any actual friends to tell things to, so by posting stories about my life on here, I can at least pretend someone is listening... 2nd I figure enough weird /funny/odd things happen to me in a day that why not share them. I always thought my life would make a good novel, I've just never been too sure of what kind it would be. Something between a comedy, an inspirational sports flick (just wait, if Rudy can play for Notre Dame why can't I someday ride for Quick-Step (Watch out Boonen)), or a romantic tragedy (emphasis on tragedy). Either way its bound to be a best seller. 3rd and finally, now that I am in Grad school, I've actually got quite a bit more time on my hands. After spending the first 2 weeks of the school year watching every You-Tube video I could find on bicycle messengers I decided I needed a new hobby. So here it is in all it's glory.